Shane Oman: Why are you eating a Kalteen bar?
Regina: I'm starving.
Shane Oman: Man, I hate those things. Coach Carr makes us eat those when we want to move up a weight class.
Shane Oman: They make you gain weight like crazy.
Regina: Motherf... Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
- Permalink: Why are you eating a Kalteen bar? I'm starving. Man, I hate...
Regina: Why were you talking to Janis Ian?
Cady: I don't know, I mean, she's so weird, she just, you know, came up to me and started talking to me about crack.
Regina: She's so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... Whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend Kyle who was totally gorgeous but then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like, "Why didn't you call me back?" And I'd be like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?" So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls pool party, I was like, "Janis, I can't invite you, because I think you're lesbian." I mean I couldn't have a lesbian at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their *bathing suits*. I mean, right? She was a LESBIAN. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack.
- Permalink: Hey! Why were you talking to Janis Ian? I don't know, I mea...
Jason: Is your muffin buttered?
Jason: Would you like us to assign someone to butter your muffin?
Cady: My what?
Regina: Is he bothering you? Jason, why are you such a skeeze?
Jason: I'm just being friendly.
- Permalink: Is your muffin buttered? What? Would you like us to assign ...
Regina: But you're, like, really pretty.
Cady: Thank you.
Regina: So you agree?
Regina: You think you're really pretty?
Cady: Oh... I don't know
- Permalink: But you're, like, really pretty. Thank you. So you agree? ...