Ron Burgundy: We've got a job in New York City.
Brian Fantana: Hey Ron, who's driving?
Ron Burgundy: It's okay. It’s on cruise control.
Champ Kind: Why do you have this bag of bowling balls and this terrarium filled with scorpions?
Ron Burgundy: It's a crazy story.
Brian Fantana: Cruise control just regulates speed. It doesn't steer.
Baxter: [barks]
Brick Tamland: He says we're all gonna die!
[Motorhome crashes]
Ron Burgundy: That is going to make one hell of a story.

Ron Burgundy: Brick, can you hear me?
Brick Tamland: I can't hear you.
Ron Burgundy: You're answering so I think you can hear me.
Brick Tamland: No, I can't.

Brick Tamland: Let's take a look at the big map. Where’s the map?
Ron Burgundy: Take a look at the monitor.
Brick Tamland: Oh god, Ron, where's my legs? I don't have any legs, Ron. Ahhh! In 93, 93…

Champ Kind: That's Jack Kind. Look at him. He's a prince.
Ron Burgundy: He's not that great.
Jack Lime: What'd you say?
Brick Tamland: [yelling] He said you're not that great!
Ron Burgundy: Brick!

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I can always guess how many jelly beans are in a jelly bean jar, even if I’m wrong.

Ed Harken: We all loved Brick.
Ron Burgundy: Sweet Brick
Ed Harken: I'm told the next speaker was very close to him.
Brick Tamland: Why?! Why did you take him from us?!
Ron Burgundy: Brick, you're not dead.
Brick Tamland: I'm alive?
Ron, Champ and Brian: Yes
Brick Tamland: I'm alive!

Ron Burgundy: You're not black or Asian.
GNN Reporter: I'm gay.
Champ Kind: Do you sleep in a coffin?
GNN Reporter: No, that’s vampires.
Brian Fantana: Are you allowed to be out in the sun?
GNN Reporter: Those are also vampires.
Brick Tamland: Are you a vampire?

Brick Tamland: Your hair looks like wet popcorn.
Chani: I like the parts of your face that are covered with skin.

Ron Burgundy: Um, Brick, before I let you go, are you still having your celebrity golf tournament?
Brick Tamland: Um, no, no. Too many people died last year, so we're not gonna.

I ate fiberglass insulation. It wasn't cotton candy like the guy said... my tummy itches.

Brick Tamland: [opposing women in the newsroom] I read somewhere their periods attract bears. Bears can smell the menstruation.
Brian Fantana: Well, that's just great. You hear that, Ed? Bears. Now you're putting the whole station in jeopardy.

I'm Brick Tamland. People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late. I like to eat ice cream and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an I.Q. of 48 and am what some people call mentally retarded.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 16 in total

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Brick Tamland

Brick Tamland Picture

Brick Tamland is the smartest knife in the news room's drawer. He tends to stammer (and make up words), but this weatherman is someone you can count on in a fight: he killed someone in the news team's fight with other news teams. Beware of the Brick!

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