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Henry Hill: You're a pistol, you're really funny. You're really funny.
Tommy DeVito: What do you mean I'm funny?
Henry Hill: It's funny, you know. It's a good story, it's funny, you're a funny guy.
Tommy DeVito: What do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?
Henry Hill: It's just, you know. You're just funny, it's... funny, the way you tell the story and everything.
Tommy DeVito: [it becomes quiet] Funny how? What's funny about it?
Anthony Stabile: Tommy no, You got it all wrong.
Tommy DeVito: Oh, oh, Anthony. He's a big boy, he knows what he said. What did ya say? Funny how?
Henry Hill: Jus...
Tommy DeVito: What?
Henry Hill: Just... ya know... you're funny. Tommy DeVito: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
Henry Hill: Just... you know, how you tell the story, what?
Tommy DeVito: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!
Henry Hill: [long pause] Get the fuck out of here, Tommy!
Tommy DeVito: [everyone laughs] Ya motherfucker! I almost had him, I almost had him. Ya stuttering prick ya. Frankie, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning.
Kidding? How am I meant to know you're kidding? You're breaking my fucking balls.Tommy DeVito
Go home and get your fucking shine box.Billy Batts
You know, we always called each other good fellas. Like you said to, uh, somebody,Henry Hill
[after killing Morrie] I thought he'd never shut the fuck up.Tommy DeVito
What the fuck are you doing? You're hanging around my fuckin' neck like a vulture, like impending danger.Tommy DeVito
[narrating] Paulie may have moved slow, but it was only because Paulie didn't have to move for anybody.Henry Hill
All they got from Paulie was protection from other guys looking to rip them off. That's what it's all about. That's what the FBI can never understand - that what Paulie and the organization offer is protection for the kinds of guys who can't go to the cops. They're like the police department for wiseguys.Henry Hill
What am I? A schmuck on wheels?Morrie
Henry Hill: [narrating] And then there was Jimmy Two Times, who got that nickname because he said everything twice, like
Jimmy Two Times: I'm gonna go get the papers, get the papers.
[narrating] Whenever we needed money, we'd rob the airport. To us, it was better than Citibank.Henry Hill
Jimmy was the kind of guy that rooted for bad guys in the movies.Henry Hill