Vanessa Loring: How do I look?
Bren: Like a new mom. Scared shitless.

Leah: Woah check out baby big head. That thing is freaky looking.
Juno MacGuff: Excuse me? I am a sacred vessel, alright? All you've got in your stomach is Taco Bell.

Paulie Bleeker: I still have your underwear.
Juno MacGuff: I still have your virginity.
Paulie Bleeker: Shut up.

Paulie Bleeker is about as good as it gets when it comes to boyfriends.

Juno MacGuff

Can we make out now?

Paulie Bleeker

Juno MacGuff: I could like, have this baby and give it to someone who like totally needs it.
Leah: You should look in the PennySaver.
Juno MacGuff: They have ads for parents?
Leah: Yeah! 'Desperately Seeking Spawn.'

Juno MacGuff: [yelling through the house] Uh, dad?
Mac MacGuff: Yeah?
Juno MacGuff: Either I just wet my pants... or...
Mac MacGuff: "Or"...?
Juno MacGuff: Or... THUNDERCATS ARE GO!

Mac MacGuff: And this, of course, is Juno.
Mark Loring: Juno, like the city in Alaska?
Juno MacGuff: No.
Mark Loring: Oh okay...

That ain't no etch-a-sketch. That's one doodle that can't be un-did, homeskillet.

Rollo

If I could just have the thing and give it to you now, I totally would. But I'm guessing it looks, probably like a sea monkey right now, and I should let it get a little cuter.

Juno MacGuff

Juno MacGuff: I think I'm, like, in love with you.
Paulie Bleeker: You mean as friends?
Juno MacGuff: No, I mean, like, for real. 'Cause you're, like, the coolest person I've ever met, and you don't even have to try, you know...
Paulie Bleeker: I try really hard, actually.

Mac MacGuff: Did you see that coming?
Bren: Yeah... but I was hoping she was expelled, or into hard drugs.
Mac MacGuff: Or DWI... anything but this.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 17 in total

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Juno Quotes

That ain't no etch-a-sketch. That's one doodle that can't be un-did, homeskillet.

Rollo

Vanessa Loring: Your parents are probably wondering where you are.
Juno MacGuff: Nah... I mean, I'm already pregnant, so what other kind of shenanigans could I get into?

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