Thank You for Smoking Quotes

Senator Ortolan Finistirre: That's ludicrous - The great state of Vermont will not apologize for its cheese!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Heather Holloway: My other interviews have pinned you as a mass murderer, blood sucker, pimp, profiteer and my personal favorite, yuppie Mephistopheles.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jeff Megall: [Talking to Nick on the phone, late at night] Gotta go. London. It's 7 AM in the Old Empire.
Nick Naylor: When do you sleep?
Jeff Megall: [pause] Sunday.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Kid #3: My Mommy says smoking kills.
Nick Naylor: Oh, is your Mommy a doctor?
Kid #3: No.
Nick Naylor: A scientific researcher of some kind?
Kid #3: No.
Nick Naylor: Well then she's hardly a credible expert, is she?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Nick Naylor: My job requires a certain... moral flexibility.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Nick Naylor: That's the beauty of argument, if you argue correctly, you're never wrong.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Joey Naylor: Dad, why is the American government the best government?
Nick Naylor: Because of our endless appeals system.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Nick Naylor: You know the guy who can pick up any girl? I'm him. On crack.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jack: I'm going to impale your mom on a spike and feed her dead body to my dog with syphilis.
Brad: Ha, you got me!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Nick Naylor: Don't forget, I'm his father. You're just the guy who f**ks his mom.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0