We dictators aren't all bad. While Western countries continue to ravage our planet's resources, we preserve our land and conserve it by burying thousands of bones in single mass eco-graves.

General Aladeen

• Permalink: We dictators aren't all bad. While Western countries continue to...
• Added: June 07, 2012

Store Customer: God, the police are such fascist bastards.
General Aladeen: Yes, and not even in a good way.

• Permalink: God, the police are such fascist bastards. Yes, and not even i...
• Added: June 07, 2012

I love it when women go to school. It's like seeing a monkey on roller skates -- it means nothing to them, but it's so adorable for us.

General Aladeen

• Permalink: I love it when women go to school. It's like seeing a monkey on ...
• Added: June 07, 2012

General Aladeen: You're an Apple Genius, so what do you do?
Nadal: Mostly I clean semen out of laptops.

• Permalink: You're an Apple Genius, so what do you do? Mostly I clean seme...
• Added: June 07, 2012

[to his pregnant wife] Is this a boy or an abortion?

General Aladeen

• Permalink: Is this a boy or an abortion?
• Added: June 07, 2012

You two make a cute couple. But could you do this later? When you're not elbow deep in my vagina?

Pregnant Woman

• Permalink: You two make a cute couple. But could you do this later? When yo...
• Added: June 07, 2012

General Aladeen: Sub Saharan, can you have 150 child warriors here by 5:00pm?

• Permalink: 00pm?
• Added: June 07, 2012

I am very proud to be an American. I am America's number one douche.

General Aladeen

• Permalink: I am very proud to be an American. I am America's number one dou...
• Added: May 18, 2012

General Aladeen: Don't worry, I am Wadiya's number one actor. You don't win 4 Wadiyan Golden Globes for nothing.
Nadal: Yes you do, because you gave them to yourself!

• Permalink: Don't worry, I am Wadiya's number one actor. You don't win 4 Wad...
• Added: May 18, 2012