Nicholas: I'll give you a boost.
Christine: You first.
Nicholas: This isn't an attempt to be gallant. If I don't lift you, how are you going to get there?
Christine: You pull me up.
Nicholas: It's much easier this way. Come on, step up...
Christine: No.
Nicholas: Please...
Christine: I'm not wearing underwear. Okay? There, I said it. Satisfied?
Nicholas: Oh. Fine.

Daniel Schorr: [on TV] There's a tiny camera looking at you right now.
Nicholas: That's impossible.
Daniel Schorr: You're right, impossible. You're having a conversation with your television.

And you really believe that just because you publish children's books, people care about my reputation? You can have pictures of me wearing nipple rings, butt fucking Captain Kangaroo. The only thing they care about is the stock and whether that stock is up or down!

Nicholas

Nicholas: What's that?
Conrad: [signs document] This... is... the bill.
Nicholas: Do you want to split it?
Conrad: [exhales] Oh God yes! I'll take some of that...
[shows Nicholas enormous number at bottom]
Nicholas: [shocked] Oh my God.

New Member Ted: This was the best one ever!
Jim Feingold: [shakes Nicholas' hand] You know, thank God you jumped, because if you didn't, I was supposed to throw you off!

Nicholas: No, what is this? What are you... selling?
Jim Feingold: Oh. It's a game.

They won't leave me alone! I'm a goddamn human piñata!

Conrad

Did I have a choice? Did I have a choice?

Nicholas

Nicholas: [reading card] "Consumer Recreation Services." Well, I do have golf clubs.
Conrad: Call that number.
Nicholas: Why?
Conrad: Make your life... fun.
Nicholas: Fun.
Conrad: You know what that is... uh, you've seen other people have it.

Conrad: This is for you.
Nicholas: You shouldn't have.
Conrad: What do you get for the man who has... everything?

I don't care about the money. I'm pulling back the curtain. I want to meet the wizard.

Nicholas

We're like an experiential Book-of-the-Month Club.

Jim Feingold
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 18 in total

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The Game Quotes

Nicholas: There goes a thousand dollars.
Christine: Your shoes cost a thousand dollars?
Nicholas: That one did.

Discovering the object of the game *is* the object of the game.

Daniel Schorr