W.W. Beauchamp: Who, uh, who'd you kill first?
Will Munny: Huh?
W.W. Beauchamp: When confronted by superior numbers, an experienced gunfighter will always fire on the best shot first.
Will Munny: Is that so?
W.W. Beauchamp: Yeah, Little Bill told me that. And you probably killed him first, didn't you?
Will Munny: I was lucky in the order, but I've always been lucky when it comes to killin' folks.

Jack Wyatt: [takes a drink of something Uncle Arthur has just made in the blender] This tastes awful!
Uncle Arthur: I know. I just like to blend.

Grim Reaper: I believe Colonel Mustard did it in the study with a candlestick.
Bill: Sorry, death, you lose! It was Professor Plum!
Grim Reaper: I said Plum!
Ted: No way! You said Mustard! Can we go back now?
Grim Reaper: Uh, best three out of five!
Ted: I don't believe this guy!

You kinda look like a shiny mermaid.


Is Terrance and Philip affecting America's youth? Here with that report is a midget in a bikini.


Somebody find me a tie! I don't care what kind, but by God, it had better be red!

The Spirit

That's a nice boy. Go get 'em, Dulli.


Ammar: Please help me.
Maya: You can help yourself by being truthful.

All mentors have a way of seeing more of our faults than we would like. It's the only way we grow.


For God's sake, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a pool man!

Ace Ventura

Jack: Wouldn't it be great if we heard a train go by in the distance?
Peter: No.
Francis: It'd probably be annoying.

Moe: Mind your P's and Q's!
Curly: Don't forget to dot the I's!

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