Patrick Bateman: I'm on a diet.
Jean: What, you're kidding, right? You look great... so fit... and thin.
Patrick Bateman: Well, you can always be thinner... look better.
Jean: Then maybe we shouldn't go out to dinner. I wouldn't want you to lose your willpower.
Patrick Bateman: That's okay. I'm not very good at controlling it anyway.

In some circles, the Mint 400 is a far far better thing than the superbowl, the Kentucky Derby, and the lower Oakland roller derby finals all rolled into one.

Raoul Duke

Just once, I'd like a regular, normal Christmas. A little eggnog... a fuckin' Christmas tree... a little turkey. But, no. I gotta crawl around in this motherfuckin' tin can.

John McClane

I'll go to your room, but you'll have to seduce me.

Cristina

Ace: OK, all looks good, you know, you never really know until you check things out yourself.
Fulton Greenwall: Well, aren't you going to go investigate?
Ace: ITS DARK IN THERE... I MIGHT FALL INTO A PRECIPICE!

You're lucky it was just me who figured it. Otherwise you would have had all three of us for wedding guests.

Ray Coleman

Eli: [when he grabs his paintball gun] It says here that the shooter must maintain a 100-yard distance from target.
Dr. P: [shoots Eli in the chest] Anyone else wanna read their gun?

Sarah Marshall: Remember how we thought the killer masturbated before commiting his crimes?
Detective Hunter Rush: Yes?
Sarah Marshall: Take a look...
Detective Hunter Rush: ...Looks like where he's going he'll need to know how to masturbate.

Sue: What? Come guys I couldn't back down, that guy called me a bitch we kept our "rep" bro.
Charles: Man, fuck "rep" I got a call back tomorrow!

I think you do. There's another kind. Not high-minded, not pure, but alive. Now, that your tastes at this time should incline towards the juvenile is understandable; but for you to marry that boy would be a disaster. Because there's two kinds of women. There are two kinds of women and you, as we well know, are not the first kind. You, my dear, are a slut.

Komarovski

[to Claire] Wake up, Claire! Jim's dead! He's dead! They're all dead!

Ethan Hunt

Come on, Kate. It's time to put your mouth where our balls are.

Peter La Fleur

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