Can you point me to the crapper? I have to drop some timber.

Joanne

Dr. King Schultz: [toasting their business transaction] Prost!
Calvin Candie: [toasting in kind] ... German.

JUST a bit outside.

Harry Doyle

The most important thing in business is honesty, integrity, hardwork... family... never forgetting where we came from.

Frank Lucas

You spend all your time preaching about waiting for love. Well here it is. Right in front of you, and you're going to turn your back on it. So I guess we're just f*ucked. I'll move on. But you are going to have to live the rest of your life knowing that you've turned your back on love. And that makes you a hypocrite. Have a nice life.

Sebastian

Bella, would you please stop trying to take your clothes off?

Edward Cullen

[after catching Harry scribbling on his paper]
Professor Severus Snape: Tell me, what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?
[Harry doesn't answer]
Professor Severus Snape: You don't know? Well, let's try again... Where, Mr. Potter, would you look if I asked you to find me a bezoar?
Harry: I don't know, sir.
Professor Severus Snape: And what is the difference between monkshood and wolfsbane?
Harry: I don't know, sir.
Professor Severus Snape: Pity... clearly, fame isn't everything, is it, Mr. Potter?

Tugg Speedman: There were times while I was playing Jack where I felt
[pause]
Tugg Speedman: Retarded. Like, really retarded.
Kirk Lazarus: Moronical?
Tugg Speedman: Yeah!
Kirk Lazarus: An Imbicile?
Tugg Speedman: Yeah!
Kirk Lazarus: Like the dumbest motherfucker that ever lived?
Tugg Speedman: [pause] When I was playing the character.

Martin Frohm: What would you say if man walked in here with no shirt, and I hired him? What would you say?
Christopher Gardner: He must have had on some really nice pants.

Thorny: Look, kid, he doesn't want it.
Farva: I can handle this, Thorn. I don't want it!
Dimpus Burger Guy: Uhh, right. Beverage?
Farva: Gimme a liter o' cola.
Dimpus Burger Guy: What?
Farva: [Annoyed] A liter o' cola.
Dimpus Burger Guy: [into mic] Litercola? Do we sell litercola?
Thorny: Will you just order a large, Farva?
Farva: I don't want a large farva. I want a goddamn liter o' cola!
Dimpus Burger Guy: [to Farva] I don't know what that is!
Farva: [slowly starts shouting] Liter is French for...
[grabs burger kid by shirt]
Farva: ... give me my fuckin' cola before I break VOUS FUCKIN' LIP!

Alright, let me be the first to say congratulations to then. You get one vagina for the rest of your life. Real smart Frank. Way to work it through.

Beanie

I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.

Jane

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