You have been warned!

The Lorax

Moe: Mind your P's and Q's!
Curly: Don't forget to dot the I's!

William Shakespeare: Follow that boat!
First Boatman: Right you are, guv'nor!... I know your face. Are you an actor?
William Shakespeare: [oh God, here we go again] Yes.
First Boatman: Yes, I've seen you in something. That one about a king.
William Shakespeare: Really?
First Boatman: I had that Christopher Marlowe in my boat once.

Oh, Mrs. Dalloway... Always giving parties to cover the silence.

Richard Brown

Susan Cooper: [Wakes up next to Ford in bed] Aaaaah!
Rick Ford: Oh, stop screaming, you loved it.

If you get blood on the carpet you're going to have to take the carpet up!

Valentine

Lina. She can't act, she can't sing, she can't dance. A triple threat.

Cosmo Brown

Did anyone else tread in a cowpat? No, thought not.

Tom

Um... a malt Glen Garry for me and my friend here. And if you tell that bartender to go extra easy on the water, this 50 cent piece has your name on it.

Trent

Walter Keane: Would you rather sell a $500 painting, or a million cheaply reproduced posters?
Walter Keane: See, folks don't care if it's a copy.

What's the matter, Colonel Sandurz? CHICKEN?

Dark Helmet

Those guys are fags.

Jeff Spicoli

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