Hey, Jake. Jake. I gotta pull over.
[drives the Bluesmobile through a guardrail]

Elwood

I have a dream. It's not a big dream, it's just a little dream. My dream - and I hope you don't find this too crazy - is that I would like the people of this community to feel that if, God forbid, there were a fire, calling the fire department would actually be a wise thing to do. You can't have people, if their houses are burning down, saying, "Whatever you do, don't call the fire department!" That would be bad.

C.D. Bales

I wonder what ASAP means anyways. Maybe act swiftly awesome pacaderm.

Horton

Ben: So let's start the interrogation.
Molly: No, no, it's not like that.
Ian: [finishes his drink and hands it to Ben] Here, for the urine test.
Ben: Aw, really? I wish you would have told me I just wizzed in your bushes.

Ritchie: That's it. You're fired.
Isabel Bigelow: Doesn't matter... I quit! Yeah, so you better call my agent.
Jim Fields: You don't have an agent.
Isabel Bigelow: Then call my cable man!

Camille: Are you going to jail?
Tyler Gage: No, I'm not going to jail, but they will have to take me to jail if you don't start knocking. Get outta here.

Rob: Liking both Marvin Gaye and Art Garfunkel is like supporting both the Israelis and the Palestinians.
Laura: No, it's really not, Rob. You know why? Because Marvin Gaye and Art Garfunkel make pop records.
Rob: Made. Made. Marvin Gaye is dead. His father shot him.

[after swallowing a bunch of pills] All she's got is Nyquill and fucking Midol!

Junior

We didn't run out of planes and television sets. We ran out of food.

Principal

Erica Barry: You know what, Harry. If it's all right with you, I'd like to be friends.
Harry Sanborn: Friends? I'm not ready to be your friend!
Erica Barry: Fine, I understand.
Harry Sanborn: And anyway, do you really buy that horse shit that a man and a woman can be friends after they've had sex?
Erica Barry: I'm friends with my ex-husband but then again, we didn't just have sex.
Harry Sanborn: We didn't just have sex either.
Erica Barry: Then what was it? I'd love to know.
Harry Sanborn: Can I e-mail it to you when I figure it out?

You know everyone in this family has gone total outer limits.

Samantha

Paulie Bleeker: Come on, let me carry your bag.
Juno MacGuff: Oh, what's another ten pounds?

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