Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How tall are you, private?
Private Cowboy: Sir, five-foot-nine, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Five-foot-nine, I didn't know they stacked shit that high!
Mike Enslin: Lily, did you call the police?
Lily Enslin: Yeah. They're in room 1408. The room's empty.
Ok, folks, the guy in front of you is Tommy, he's gonna be taking you through my little spiel here. Tommy is a Scorpio, he likes biking and he's never been laid.Richard Hayden
Rocco Dillon: Where's your prison number?
Frank Drebin: It's unlisted.
[to an unconscious Spock] I'm gonna tell you something that I... never thought I'd ever hear myself say. But it seems I've... missed you. And I don't know if I could stand to lose you again.McCoy
[singing] Nothing ever happens on Mars/No sports or entertainment/No swinging bars/You stand around/You stand some more/On a planet named for the Roman god of war.Dr. Allan Pearl
Back home, they put me in jail for what I'm doing. Here, they give me awards.Ace Rothstein
John Doe: It's more comfortable for you to label me as insane.
David Mills: It's very comfortable.
Ted Reilly: Tom, you are a lucky man. Boy, would I like to get some of that.
Richard Hayden: Good lord.
Ted Reilly: Oh, God. No. Richard, you got an edit button on that thing?
Richard Hayden: [backing away] It'll cost you!
Ted Reilly: Come here. Come here, you little prick!
Translator: Right side. And with more... intensity. Okay?
Bob: Is that everything? It seemed like he said quite a bit more than that.
Director: [to Bob, in Japanese] Listen, listen. This isn't just about whiskey. Understand? Imagine you're talking to an old friend. Gently. The emotions bubble up from the bottom of your heart. And don't forget, psych yourself up!
Translator: Like an old friend. Into the camera.
Director: [in Japanese] Got it? You LOVE whiskey. It's SUNTORY time. Okay!?
Cutter: Take a minute to consider your achievement. I once told you about a sailor who drowned.
Robert Angier: Yes, he said it was like going home.
Cutter: I lied. He said it was agony.
Dewey Finn: Now, what makes you mad more than anything in the world?
[sees Billy who has his hand raised]
Dewey Finn: Billy?
Dewey Finn: Billy, we've already told me off. Let's move on.
Billy: You're tacky and I hate you!
Dewey Finn: Okay, you see me after class