Lester Burnham: How's Jane?
Angela Hayes: What do you mean?
Lester Burnham: I mean, how's her life? Is she happy? Is she miserable? I'd really like to know, and she'd die before she'd ever tell me about it.
Angela Hayes: She's... she's really happy. She thinks she's in love.
Lester Burnham: Good for her.
Angela Hayes: How are you?
Lester Burnham: God, it's been a long time since anybody asked me that... I'm great.

Harold: I want that.
Kumar: What? A Hot Dog Heaven super chili cheese dog?
Harold: No. I want that feeling. The feeling that comes over a man when he gets exactly what he desires. I need that feeling!
Kumar: Are you saying what I think you're saying?
Harold: We gotta go to White Castle.
Kumar: YES! YES! I knew you had it in you dude!

Julian Mercer: The woman is really very brilliant, but she cannot hold her liquor.
Erica Barry: I like that about me.
Julian Mercer & Harry Sanborn: Me too.

I thought you'd never guess. My favourite - hot chocolate.


You got the right to be bitch-slapped.


You should be reading stories about bears that go shopping!

Detective John Kimble

Gracie: Get off of me! I thought you were gay!
Neil Patrick Harris: I am gay...gay for that!

[stands tall with a hand over his heart] Mayor Goldie Wilson. Like the sound of that.

Goldie Wilson

Jack: What are you afraid of?
Alex Rover: Everything!

I vow to live within the warmth of your heart.


Colonel Robert G. Shaw: So what do you want to do?
Trip: Don't know, sir.
Colonel Robert G. Shaw: It stinks, I suppose.
Trip: Yeah, It stinks bad. And we all covered up in it too. Ain't nobody clean. Be nice to get clean, though.
Colonel Robert G. Shaw: How do we do that?
Trip: We ante up and kick in, sir. But I still don't want to carry your flag.

Mason, the second you don't respect this, it kills you.

Stanley Goodspeed

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