I thought Tristan would never live to be an old man. I was wrong about that. I was wrong about many things. It was those who loved him most who died young. He was a rock they broke themselves against however much he tried to protect them.

One Stab

Hey, Sydney! I could be in Venice by five. I could do that.

Peter

Chili Palmer: Hey, Karen, how you doing?
Karen Flores: What are you doing here?
Chili Palmer: Listen, I wanted to come by and apologize for breaking in the way I did last night.
Karen Flores: So, let me get this straight. You broke in again to apologize for breaking in before?
Chili Palmer: No, no. Your patio door was open. And you shouldn't do that because you got a lot of nice things in this house.
Karen Flores: Well, make sure you lock it on your way out.

[last lines]
Tommy Corn: What are you doing tomorrow?
Albert Markovski: I was thinking about chaining myself to a bulldozer. Do you want to come?
Tommy Corn: What time?
Albert Markovski: Mmm, 1, 1:30.
Tommy Corn: Sounds good. Should I bring my own chains?
Albert Markovski: We always do.

Too bad Hallmark doesn't make a "Sorry your dodgeball coach got killed by two tons of irony" card.

Peter La Fleur

[to dead alligator] You're luggage!

John

What if I told you that instead of gettin' older, I was gettin' younger than everybody else?

Benjamin Button

Randal Graves: Ladies and gentlemen, and you, Elias! Straight from the debauchery capital of the world, TI-juana Mexico!
Dante Hicks: Oh, God, no.
Randal Graves: Oh, God, yes!

Smiles: Yeah, they wanted me to fix my teeth.
Jenny Kido: I like you teeth!
Smiles: Thanks, I like your accent.
Jenny Kido: What accent?
Smiles: That accent you got... You have an accent.

Rick: What'd you do this time?
Jonathan: Well, I haven't done anything to anybody.
[bullets fly through the door]
Jonathan: ...lately.

Prepare to be humiliated on cable television!

White Goodman

Holden McNeil: We've got to beat traffic.
Banky Edwards: What traffic? It's 1:30 in the morning!
Holden McNeil: Yeah, and rush hour starts in six hours. Let's go.

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