Merovingian: Oh my god Persephone, how could you do this? You betrayed me.
[Stream of French]
Persephone: Cause and Effect, my love.
Merovingian: Cause? There is no cause for this. What cause?
Persephone: What cause? How about the lipstick you're still wearing?
Merovingian: Lipstick? Lipstick? Heh, what craziness are you talking about woman? There is no lipstick.
[checks his face]
Persephone: She wasn't kissing your face, my love.

Randal Graves: The jizz-mopper's job is to clean off the glass after each guy shoots a load. I don't know if you noticed, but cum leaves streaks if you don't clean it right away.
Offended Customer: I will never come to this place again!
Dante Hicks: I'm sorry?
Offended Customer: Using filthy language in front of the customers, you both should be fired!
Dante Hicks: I'm sorry, I guess we got carried away.
Offended Customer: I don't know if sorry could make up for it, you've highly offended me.
Randal Graves: Well if you thinks that's offensive, check this out! I think you can see her kidneys!

[wakes Jim up from his dream by slamming his cane against his desk] Wake up, Mr. Carroll, it's later than you think!

Father McNulty

Few people understand the psychology of dealing with a highway traffic cop. A normal speeder will panic and immediately pull over to the side. This is wrong. It arouses contempt in the cop heart. Make the bastard chase you. He will follow. But he won't know what to make of your blinker signal that says you are about to turn right. This is to let him know you're pulling off for a proper place to talk. It will take him a moment to realize that he's about to make a 180 degree turn at speed, but you will be ready for it. Brace for the g's, and fast heel-toe work.

Raoul Duke

[With tears in her eyes] Well, I think they ought to take the word 'compassion' out of the English dictionary.

Gareth Peirce

Stomach of the week. Unemployed actor had frankfurter, french fries, alcohol, and sperm. Hell of a last supper, don't you think?

Ray Pinker

Don't you think it's ironic that Rebecca Bloomwood is advising people on how to handle money.

Suze

Aloha. My name is Mr. Hand.

Mr. Hand

Angelica Bell: What were you thinking about?
Virginia Woolf: I was going to kill my heroine. But I've changed my mind.

Who, in their right mind Kevin, could possibly deny the twentieth century was entirely mine.

John Milton

Barney Ross: [watching Luna fight] I could do that.
Bonaparte: You wanna slip on a dress and give it a shot?

I blew the meet with Matsui.

Linus Caldwell

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