Samantha Coleman: You give me this story and I'll have your baby.
John McClane: Not the kind of ride I'm looking for.

Peter Parker: I got to stop him, though. I have to because I created him.
Gwen Stacy: What do you mean?
Peter Parker: I gave him an equation... that made all of this possible. Something my father had been working on, you know. Secretly. Now I realize why he kept it a secret. Point is, this is my responsibility. I have to fix it.

Dr. Samuel Loomis: [in a press conference] Let me make this clear: Michael Myers is dead! D-E-A-D!

Rocky: Don't smoke that. It makes your breath like garbage.
Marie: Maybe I like garbage.
Rocky: [putting out the cigarette] Nobody likes garbage!

Bretton James: I'm afraid the motorcycle ride is going to cost your severance pay.
Jacob Moore: Fuck you, James!

Auda abu Tayi: I am Auda abu Tayi! Does Auda serve? Howeitat tribesmen: NO! Auda abu Tayi: Does Auda abu Tayi serve? Howeitat tribesmen: NO! Auda abu Tayi: [to Lawrence] I carry twenty-three great wounds, all got in battle. Seventy-five men have I killed with my own hands in battle. I scatter, I burn my enemies' tents. I take away their flocks and herds. The Turks pay me a golden treasure, yet I am poor! Because *I* am a river to my people!

Hancock: Who are we?
Mary Embrey: Gods, angels...Different cultures call us by different names. Now all of a sudden it's superhero.
Hancock: Are there more of us?
Mary Embrey: There were. They all died. It's just the two of us.

[on condoms] Well, they're safer than a tube sock...

Jim's Dad

Gwen DeMarco: Fred, you had a part people loved. I mean, my TV Guide interview was six paragraphs about my BOOBS and how they fit into my suit. No one bothered to ask me what I do on the show.
Fred Kwan: You were... the umm, wait a minute, I'll think of it...
Gwen DeMarco: I repeated the computer, Fred.

Saved by the bell.

James Bond

The future belongs to those who know where they belong.

Jeanine Matthews

Jenko: What? Co-ed bathrooms!
Schmidt: Fuck! I'm not gonna take a shit the entire time we're here.

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