I always enjoyed learning a new tongue.

James Bond

Ash: Linda's still asleep. I don't know what else to do for her. It'll be dawn in a few hours so...
Scotty: I can't wait. I'm getting out of here... now!
Ash: Scotty, we can't take Linda anywhere with her leg like that. We don't even know if there is any other way back besides the bridge.
Scotty: Well... maybe there's an old road or a hiking trail or something. I mean, there must be another away around the cliff.
Ash: Listen to me. Linda cannot walk with her leg like that. She can't even stand up.
Scotty: So, we'll leave her here until we can send somebody back.
Ash: What, are you crazy? I'm not...
Scotty: Look, I'm getting out of here! I don't care what happens to her! She's your girlfriend, not mine.

Step right up and shoot the pasties off the nipples of a ten foot bull dyke! Win a cotton candy goat!

Clown Barker

Carl Denham: [filming the dinosaurs] Walk forward, Bruce.
Bruce Baxter: What?
Carl Denham: You're the star of this picture. Get into character and head towards the animals.
Bruce Baxter: What the hell kind of place is this? Are you sure about this, Denham? Don't we have a stand-in for this type of thing?
Carl Denham: I need you in the shot, or people will say they're fake.
Bruce Baxter: Oh nobody's gonna think these are fake.

Scott: [on Jerry Springer show] How could you do this to me? On national television!
Dr. Evil: Well throw me a freakin' bone here, Scott.
Scott: Why did you run out on me?
Dr. Evil: Because you're not quite evil enough. [audience boos] It's true! It's true! You're semi-evil. You're quasi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil. Just one calorie, not evil enough.

Joel Goodson: You know, Bill, there's one thing I learned in all my years. Sometimes you just gotta say, "What the fuck. Make your move."
Rutherford: I beg your pardon?

Rita: Are you drunk or something?
Phil: Drunk is more fun.

You've fooled them, haven't you Michael? But not me.

Dr. Sam Loomis

I can be your best friend or your worst enemy. You seem to prefer the latter.

Chip Douglas

Why do I get the feeling that we've picked up another pathetic life form?

Obi-Wan

Nicholas Angel: What's with all the cake?
Inspector Frank Butterman: Oh, that's for constable Butterman's minor indiscretion.
Nicholas Angel: [concerned] What? For last night?
Inspector Frank Butterman: Oh no, the cake is punishment for misplacing his helmet last week. No, last night's antics will require something a little more serious.
Nicholas Angel: Well I should think so. What did you have in mind?
Inspector Frank Butterman: Well let's just say we won't be running short of Chunky Monkey for the next month.
Danny Butterman: [annoyed] Daaaaaad!

Obsession is a young man's game

Cutter

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