Raymond Calitri: Am I an arsehole? Do I look like an arsehole?
Memphis: Yeah.

'Course I'm respectable. I'm old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough.

Noah Cross

Yale: You are so self-righteous, you know. I mean we're just people. We're just human beings, you know? You think you're God.
Isaac Davis: I... I gotta model myself after someone.

President Andrew Shepherd: She didn't say anything about me?
A.J.: No, but I could always pass her a note before study hall.

Jay: Well, this is fate! She's divorced, we don't want to redo the cabinets, and you need a wife. What do they call it when everything intersects?
Sam Baldwin: The Bermuda Triangle.

That's ridiculous. How can anyone possibly know that information? What else does it say?

Graham Hess

It's the times. They are a-changin'. Something's blowing in the wind. Fetch me my diet pills, would you?

Edna Turnblad

Bobby Ray: What'd I ever do to you?
Melanie Carmichael: Oh, you didn't do anything to me, darlin'... or any other girl in town!

"Now I'm going to have our three whistlers... uh... please to present the next... um, the... um... musical... there were three... musical sections here, and this'll be the third... the third section... um... and they'll play a piece... it's very recognizable, it's... Chopin, actually... it's taken... it's, it's in the style of "March Militaire", which is a very... recognizable piece, so... if you please, just... listen to this, and I'm sure you can identify the... um, I'm sort of giving away the answer here, but that's... it's... Chopin... I don't mean to give away the answer... it's... please, just... you know... sing us a ditty, guys... a Chopin ditty."

Jimmy Gator

George Bailey: You sit around here and you spin your little webs and you think the whole world revolves around you and your money. Well, it doesn't, Mr. Potter. In the whole vast configuration of things, I'd say you were nothing but a scurvy little spider! And...
[turning to his aide]
George Bailey: And that goes for you, too!

"All you need is love and to believe in yourself." [scoffs] Nice idea. It doesn't exactly work out that way. But I guess it was better to hear a flat-out lie than to know the truth at 13.


DQ: Who are you?
Mr. Smith: I'm a British nanny, and I'm dangerous.

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