When I was growing up, if we wanted a Jacuzzi, we had to fart in the tub.

Billy Ray

Troy Bolton: I've never even heard of Julliard.
Ms. Darbus: Well, that may be the case Mr. Bolton, but evidently Julliard has heard of you.

[singing along with the radio] Don't you wish your girlfriend was as hot like me? Don't you wish your girlfriend was a FREAK like me?

Rasputia

Ashley: What took you so long?
Kale: We were upstairs playing.
Ronnie: Video games!

Now will you just open your eyes to this stuff here. Now I mean, what - has she got this stuff out of teacher's pay?... Will you look at these fine feathers and furs that she comes to bring herself in here. What is this article? That's a solid gold dress, I believe... Now what is that? There's a treasure chest of a pirate... That's pearls, Stella, ropes of 'em. What is your sister - a deep sea diver? Bracelets, solid gold. (To Stella) Where are your pearls and gold bracelets?... And here you are. Diamonds. A crown for an empress... Here's your plantation Stella, right here... Well, the Kowalskis and the DuBois - there's just a different notion on this.

Stanley Kowalski

Captain: 12:30? AUTO, why didn't you wake me for morning announcements? Honestly, it's the one thing I get to do on this ship.
[Resets the ship back to morning]
Captain: Well, good morning, everybody, and welcome to day 255,642 aboard the Axiom. As always, the weather is a balmy 72 degrees and sunny, and, uh... Oh, I see the ship's log is showing that today is the 700th anniversary of our five year cruise. Well, I'm sure our forefathers would be proud to know that 700 years later we'd be... doing the exact same thing they were doing. So, be sure next mealtime to ask for your free sep-tua-centennial cupcake in a cup. Wow, look at that.

Professor Snape: That is the second time you have spoken out of turn, Miss Granger. Tell me, are you incapable of restraining yourself, or do you take pride in being an insufferable know-it-all?
Ron: He's got a point, you know.

[on phone] Hello. Dan! Hey. Oh, my God. Congratulations. lt's amazing. Do you have a name yet? Oh, no, that's terrific. Uh, probably because l'm jogging. No, l'm outside. Yes. l'm actually jogging outside. Please Playa del Rey. Don't laugh. I'm thinking about getting into...

Carter Duryea

When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns.

Toula Portokalos

I suppose you know, Bob, if I ever see you again I'm just going to start shooting and figure it was self-defense.

Little Bill Daggett

The President is safe - but then you must know that. He ran from here like a whipped dog! I'm sure you can't wait for him to get back to making the decisions so you can stop... sweating... through that silk blouse of yours!

Egor Korshunov

It's like my ex-wife. 21 different personalities and 7 of them hated me.

Jack Rose

FREE Movie Newsletter