Finding someone you think would be fun to kill is a bit like, well it's a bit like falling in love. You meet a lot of candidates, and you like some of them, and they're nice. But they're not right. And that special one comes along, and your heart beats faster, and you know that's the one.

Mr. Earl Brooks

[praying[ Dear God, than you for all your blessings. You've given me so many things, like good health, nice parents, a nice truck, and what I'm told is a large penis, and I'm very grateful, but I sure am worried about Tammy. In my heart, I still can't believe she tore down my posters, but sometimes, she does get so weird and angry. Please help her be a happier person because she's so smart and sensitive and I love her so much. Also, I'm nervous about the election tomorrow and I guess I want to win and all, but I know that's totally up to you. You'll decide who the best person is and I'll accept it. And forgive me for my sins, whatever they may be. Amen.

Paul Metzler

Film School Student: Why'd you skip film school? Don't you think you're a little young?
Eli: Shut the fuck up. Next question.

How fickle is woman.

Rhett Butler

Good morning gentlemen, I am Colonel Robert Gould Shaw. I am your commanding officer. It is a great pleasure to see you all here today. It is my hope that the same courage, spirit, and honor, which has brought us together, will one day restore this Union. May God bless us all.

Colonel Robert G. Shaw

We live and we die by time. And we must not commit the sin of losing our track on time.

Chuck Noland

Rick Ford: You're going to ruin this mission.
Susan Cooper: No, *you're* going to ruin this mission.
Rick Ford: No, you are.
Susan Cooper: No, you're going to!
Rick Ford: You... times infinity!

300 Feet! Pretty neat, pretty neat!

Johnny Blaze

Womynist #2: You dated a white male?
Samantha: I was a freshman.
Womynist #1: Fresh-person, please!

Don't be afraid of it, Daddy.

Jake Witzky

I don't dance very well when my partner has a gun in his hand.

Clara Clayton

You are not an American, you are the victim of America!

Malcolm X

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