We decided to leave town just one damn day to late!

Valentine McKee

Jensen: So what about the other drivers?
Machine-Gun Joe: It's kill or be killed.
Jensen: I can see the appeal.

They're going to blow that place sky high. It'll be a tragedy. Unless it's during a dance number.

Frank Drebin

Don't blame marriage. She's married and she's not growing a national forest.

Samantha Jones

We're supposed to be robbin' this place, you dumb fuckin' hebe!

Nicky Santoro

General Aladeen: Sub Saharan, can you have 150 child warriors here by 5:00pm?

  • Permalink: 00pm?
  • Rating: Unrated

Henry VII: Put them in the iron maiden.
Ted: Iron Maiden?
Bill, Ted: Excellent!
[air guitar]
Henry VII: Execute them.
Bill, Ted: Bogus!

You're lucky it was just me who figured it. Otherwise you would have had all three of us for wedding guests.

Ray Coleman

Bryan Mills: What’s your first priority here, inspector?
Franck Dotzler: My job is to bring you in.
Bryan Mills: My first priority is to protect the only one I have left.

Hud: Look, all I'm saying is that this thing coulda have come from anywhere! It could have come from outer space!
Marlena Diamond: Like Superman?
Hud: Yeah! Wait... you know who Superman is?
Marlena Diamond: [sarcastically] Wait, you know Superman? I think I'm feeling something here... Are you aware of Garfield?

That's right... who's laughing now... who's laughing now?

Ash

Don't ever try to fucking bribe me or I'll have you and Patchett in shit up to your ears.

Bud White

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