[driving stoned] People on 'ludes should not drive.

Jeff Spicoli

William: Father, I am afraid, I won't know the way back home.
John Thatcher: Don't be foolish, William, you just follow your feet.

Shaun: I don't think I've got it in me to shoot my mum, roommate, and girlfriend all in one day...
Liz: Who said I was taking you back?

Anthony: Which part of Mexico are you from?
Inez: Paraguay.

Mason, the second you don't respect this, it kills you.

Stanley Goodspeed

That's a lot of money to be counting out in public.

Billy Sherbert

Logan: We didn't sign up for this.
Victor Creed: Who do you think you are? This is what we do!

French journalist: Inspector, do you know if the killer was a man or woman?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Well of course I know that! What else is there? A kitten?

Kitty Fane: Walter, I'm pregnant.
Walter Fane: Kitty, am I the father?
Kitty Fane: I honestly don't know. I'm sorry.
Walter Fane: Well, it doesn't matter now. Does it?

[Mr. Peter Myers takes off the clown mask] Michael?

Mr. Peter Myers

Harry Terwilliger: We thought he was doped.
Paul Edgecomb: You didn't ask?
Harry Terwilliger: [shakes his head]
Paul Edgecomb: Well I don't think that's a mistake you'll be needing to make again anytime soon is it?

Curtis: Hey, man, want a toke?
Derek Vinyard: Curtis, what are you doing? Weed is for niggers. You put that away right now.

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