Holy crap, the vultures are eating my head!

Roy O'Bannon

All people see when they look at me is blonde hair and big boobs.

Elle

Bernie Focker: At least I'm comfortable enough in my skin to cook for my family. Tell me when was the last time you gave your wife breakfast in bed? When was the last time you gave her anything in bed?
Jack Byrnes: Now you're outta line Focker.
Bernie Focker: No man you are outta line. You hurt my feelings there. There's no reason to hurt my feelings.
[looks at Greg and points to Jack]
Bernie Focker: He insulted me.

Malik: Sure, why not? I am the token black guy. I'm just supposed to smile and stay out of the conversation and say things like: "Damn," "Shit," and "That is whack."

He does dress better than I do... what would I bring to the relationship?

Cher

Go ahead, Cornelius, you can cry.

Robert Paulson

[to Ulysses S. Grant] Each of us has made it possible for the other to do terrible things.

Abraham Lincoln

TV Sports Announcer: [announcing basketball game on TV] 3 seconds left. The shot is up...
TV Narrator: [Peyton switches channel] Welcome to the magical world of ponies!

Boog: Yeah, we'll need your nuts!
Elliot: And your acorns, too!

Patrick: Was that a yes?
Kat Stratford: No.
Patrick: Well, then, was that a no?
Kat Stratford: No.

I'm gonna turn Washington DC into a pile of ash.

Dieter Von Cunth

President Business: [On TV] Hi, I'm President Business, president of the Octan Corporation and the World. Let's all take care to follow the Instructions
President Business: , or you'll be put to sleep.
President Business: AND DON'T FORGET TACO TUESDAY'S COMING NEXT WEEK!

FREE Movie Newsletter