Don't ever try to fucking bribe me or I'll have you and Patchett in shit up to your ears.

Bud White

Gene: Now, we need to make 8 gallons of bug juice by snack hour; do you know where the powder packets are?
Gary: Yeah.
Gene: In the pantry, above the sink, right next to my bottle of dick cream... Uh, wait, forget that last part.
Gary: Did you say dick cream?
Gene: No! I said next to my... stick... team, you know, stick team! Stickball! Go away, leave me alone!

The weed of crime bears bitter fruit. Crime does not pay. The Shadow knows.


You're an idiot, don't you ever make me wait outside the door again!


Airline Employee: Aisle or window, smoking or non?
Otto: What was the part in the middle?

Mya: I don't go out with guys who don't open the door for me.
Zeke: Really?
Mya: Really
Zeke: Seriously?
Mya: Yes. No he didn't...
Zeke: Gotcha...

Homer Simpson: Okay, son. You have only one chance to throw that bomb through the hole.
Bart Simpson: Dad, in case I don't make it, I'm sorry I said I wish you weren't my dad.
Homer Simpson: I don't blame you, son. I've never been that good of a father. Maybe it all starts with the way my father raised me. Yes, it's all clear to me. It's all just been one long, unbroken chain of...
Marge Simpson: Somebody throw the goddamn bomb!

Otter: He can't do that do that to our pledges.
Boon: Only we can do that to our pledges.

[after smashing Paul's ankles with a sledgehammer] ... God I love you.

Annie Wilkes

If that girl's not careful, she's gonna wind up on the business end of my dick.

Jack Ryan

Dr. Evil: Okay, here's the plan. We get the warhead and then hold the world ransom for... 1 MILLION dollars!
Number Two: Sir, strictly speaking, a million dollars will not go very far these days. Virtucon alone makes over 9 billion dollars a year.
Dr. Evil: Really? Okay then... we hold the world ransom for one... hundred... BILLION dollars!!!

This is an art gallery, my friend, and this is a piece of art.

Elijah Price

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