Sidney Prescott: Fuck you.
Billy: We've already played that game, remember? You lost.

Liberius: Comrade Doctor, I need a medical officer. Zhivago: I'm sorry, I have a wife and child in Varykino.
Razin, Liberius' Lieutenant: ...and a mistress in Yuriatin.
Liberius: [laughs] Comrade Medical Officer, we are Red partisans, and we SHOOT deserters!

Raoul Duke: Alright listen to me. In a few hours, she'll probably be sane enough to work herself into some kind of towering Jesus-based rage at the hazy recollection of being seduced by some kind of cruel Samoan who fed her liquor and LSD, dragged her to a Vegas hotel room and then savagely penetrated every orifice in her little body with his throbbing, uncircumcised member.
Dr. Gonzo: That's so ugly, man!
Raoul Duke: Fuck. Truth hurts.

Bobby Ray: What'd I ever do to you?
Melanie Carmichael: Oh, you didn't do anything to me, darlin'... or any other girl in town!

Hitch: [talking about when kissing going 90 per cent then he goes 10] All right show me the magic.
Albert: OK.
[going to kiss Hitch]
Hitch: [after being kissed] What the hell?
Albert: Well, you said show me the magic
Hitch: Yeah, but you go 90 then I go 10. You don't go the whole hundred, you over-eager son of a... BLECH!

[after destroying a missile by shooting a bullet at it] Old man, my ass!

Marvin Boggs

[to Alison] Are you the lady who doesn't realize she's pregnant until she's sitting on the toilet and the kid pops out?

Debbie

JB: I've had this birth mark since I was born!
KG: I have ass-mark too!

Who died and made you fucking king of the zombies?

Ed

We'll be doing this for real tomorrow night and I don't want nobody to remember some stupid joke like that and get it going again. You ever try to not to laugh in church when something funny gets stuck in your head? Same goddamn thing.

Paul Edgecomb

Dante Slate, Jr.: I can get you a part in Hangover 4!
Evander Holyfield: I'm listening.
Mike Tyson: You sonofabitch!
Dante Slate, Jr.: Wait, WAIT, WAIT!
Evander Holyfield: Grab your ears!

Dwayne, you've gotta learn to kick ass if you wanna be a peacemaker.

Sheriff

FREE Movie Newsletter