I would stay asleep my whole life, if I could dream myself into a company of players.

Viola de Lesseps

Dan: I used to be so fucked. I used to be so fucked up. I was just out there. You know? But I fucking cleaned up. I cleaned up,
[snorts a line of cocaine]
Dan: For the most part. I do it now to get by, but I can handle it. You know what I mean? I tried the rehab thing. I tried it. But it didn't work, Didn't work. It works for some people. My ex girlfriend is getting married. That's how it works for some people. Right? Didn't work for me. The kids keep me focused. And I.

Sometimes you gotta let your heart lead you... even if you know its someplace you know you're not supposed to be.

Van Wilder

Ludwig Beck: Just remember: nothing ever goes according to plan.

We're very lucky in the band in that we have two visionaries, David and Nigel, they're like poets, like Shelley and Byron. They're two distinct types of visionaries, it's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water.

Derek Smalls

I may not be a smart dog, but I know what roadkill is.

Slinky Dog

Okay, not to keep dwelling on this, but that was some kiss. How did you know that will work? Have you kissed other men who then plummented to their deaths?

Maxwell Smart

Patrick Kenzie: What makes you think Ray hasn't spent all the money?
Helene McCready: Nigga please, I hid it.

Clark Kent: Thanks for giving me my job back.
Perry White: Don't thank me. Thank Norm Parker for dying!
Jimmy Olsen: It was his time

Andy's Mom:
[speaking to someone else]
Andy's Mom: Andy's going to college. Can you believe it?
Andy: Mom, I'm not leaving 'til Friday.
Andy's Mom: [about Andy's toys in the toy chest] What are you going to do with these old toys?

I need a father who's a role model, not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school. What a lame-o. Someone really should just put him out of his misery.

Jane Burnham

Leo: But you won't know where I am. I mean, I don't even know where I'll be!
Chili Palmer: I'll find you, Leo. You leave a trail like a fucking caterpillar.

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