Memphis: Still looking amazing.
Sway: While you still look like a bible salesman.
Memphis: You're healed.

You can wake up now, the universe has ended.

Jim Stark

[on Captain Howard and Captain Sinclair, having another vicious argument] They should just bone and get that shit over with.

Mike Lowrey

Supreme Chancellor: I hope you trust me, Anakin.
Anakin Skywalker: Of course.
Supreme Chancellor: I need your help, son. I want you to be the eyes, ears, and voice of the Republic. Anakin, I'm appointing you to be my personal representative on the Jedi Council.
Anakin Skywalker: Me? A Master? I'm overwhelmed, sir. But the Council elects its own members. They will never accept this.
Supreme Chancellor: I think they will. They need you, more than you know.

Holy crap balls.

Flint Lockwood

Dante Hicks: Can you feel it?
Randal Graves: Feel what?
Dante Hicks: Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.

Benji: How come I'm Pluto? I'm not even a planet.
Brandt: There's always Uranus [grins].
Benji: Hah, that was funny, 'cause you said anus.

Dr. Lars: It's too early to know who's winning the fight: the medicine or the disease.
George Simmons: Did anybody ever tell you, you have a very scary accent?
Dr. Lars: You are a very funny man. I enjoy your movies.
George Simmons: And I enjoy all of your movies.
Dr. Lars: [surprised] Which movies?
George Simmons: The ones where you try to kill Bruce Willis.

Now where are we, dude? Oh. It's my house.


William: I downloaded this little baby off the Net. I will know exactly how many spirits I may imbibe without affecting my judgment or my behavior.
X-Phile 2: You have every angle covered.
X-Phile 1: You know William, from this light, you somewhat resemble David Duchovny.

Nash: She's so small.
Charles: Well, she's young, John. That's how they come.

Vernon Fenwick: So they're aliens?
April O'Neil: No, that's stupid. They're turtles.
Bernadette Thompson: Is there anything else we should know about them?
April O'Neil: They're ninjas.

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