I'm walking on air... you know... this is a sensation which is... forget it. When I became a dentist, I thought I was happy, but this...

Dr. Pearl

Anita: You have your big important council. The council,
Anita: or me.
Bernardo: First one,
Bernardo: then the other.
[Tries to kiss her, she pulls away]
Anita: Ah, I'm an American girl now, I don't wait.
Bernardo: Ah, back home women know their place.
Anita: Back home little boys don't have war councils.
Bernardo: Ah, but they do here. You want me to be an American, don't you?

There, first time I've felt safe all day.

Pat Fearing

All I'm trying to do is being nice to the people who are volunteering to help find Amy.

Nick Dunne

Waitress: Excuse me, but are you Paul Sheldon?
Paul Sheldon: Yes.
Waitress: I just wanted to tell you I'm your number one fan!
Paul Sheldon: That's... very sweet of you...

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You know, I'm a rather brilliant surgeon. Perhaps I can help you with that hump.
Igor: What hump?

[in the car listening to "Puff the Magic Dragon"]
Greg Focker: Who'd have thought it wasn't about a dragon.
Jack Byrnes: Huh?
Greg Focker: Well some people think that 'to puff the magic dragon' means to... puff... smoke... a marijuana cigarette.
Jack Byrnes: Puff is just the name of the boy's magical dragon... You a pothead, Focker?
Greg Focker: No, I pass on grass always. Well not always.
Jack Byrnes: Yes or no?
Greg Focker: No, um, yes, um...

Sheik Ilderim: Balthasar is a good man. But until all men are like him, we must keep our swords bright!
Judah Ben-Hur: And our intentions true! So I must leave you.
Sheik Ilderim: One last thought: There is no law in the arena; many are killed... I hope to see you again, Judah Ben-Hur.

Shaun: What are you doing lying there?
Lance: Oh, my parole officer wants to give me a drug test and I need your urine... can I score some of your piss?
Shaun: Yeah.
Lance: Awesome, man.

You're sayin' the FBI's gonna pay me to learn to surf?

Johnny Utah

King Henry VIII: And who are you?
Mary Boleyn: Mary, your grace.
King Henry VIII: The other Boleyn girl?
Mary Boleyn: Yes.

If this works, you get to be Postmaster General.

President James Marshall

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