Harry: I just have one question: What's with the turtlenecks? I mean it's the middle of summer.
Erica: Well, I guess I'm just a turtleneck kind of gal.
Harry: You never get hot?
Erica: No.
Harry: Never?
Erica: Not lately.

Grandma: Liyah, baby!
Elgin: [stands up]
Grandma: [to Elgin] Sit your ass down! You leave that girl alone. I'm not telling you you can't protect your sister. But if she's making a mistake, you've got to let her make it so she can learn from it. Do you understand?
Elgin: [no response]
Grandma: I asked you a question. Elgin Barret Eugene Smith III! Do you hear me?
Elgin: Yes, ma'am.

WARD... I think you were a little hard on the beaver, so was eddie hascal, wally and mrs cleaver.

Jimmy Smith Jr

There was a guy in the bathroom - and he was really hot!

Maxwell Smart

Vinny Gambini: Mr. Wilbur, how'd you like Ms. Vito's testimony?
George Wilbur: Very impressive.
Vinny Gambini: She's cute too, huh?
George Wilbur: Yes, very.
[laughter]
Judge Chamberlain Haller: Mr. Gambini...
Vinny Gambini: Sorry, Your Honor.

What about santa's cookies? I suppose parents eat those too?

Buddy

As long as there's, you know, sex and drugs, I can do without the rock and roll.

Mick Shrimpton

Hey, doll. Could you scare up another round for our table over here? And tell the cook this is low grade dog food. I've had better food at the ballgame, you know? This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it.

Al Czervik

[to Sphinx] Damn it's cold up here, they keep these Ferrari's refrigerated? And you know black people don't like cold weather, we're tropical people. Man, when this is over I'm gonna smoke a joint, watch two hours of Roots and I'm gonna KICK YOUR ASS!

Mirror Man

Everyone's trying to get out of Washington, and we're the only schmucks trying to get in.

Julius Levinson

Barf: I know we need the money, but...
Lone Starr: Listen! We're not just doing this for money... We're doing it for a SHIT LOAD of money!
Barf: Oh, you're right. And when you're right, you're right. And you - you're always right.

Chris Farraday: I was hopin' you'd understand, it's family, maybe we could work somethin' out.
Tim Briggs: I'll give you two weeks. If not, I'm going to come after the both of you.

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