Surfing Instructor: There's only one cure for pain like that.
Peter Bretter: What?
Surfing Instructor: Weed. Ya got any?
Peter Bretter: No.
Surfing Instructor: Well then let's just go surfing!

Russell Ziskey: You could join a monastery.
John Winger: Did you ever see a monk get wildly fucked by some teenage girls?
Russell Ziskey: Never.
John Winger: So much for the monastery.

Kaffee: Did you talk to your friend at the NIS?
Lt. Weinberg: Yeah, he said if Markinson doesn't want to be found, we're not gonna find him. He said I could be Markinson and you wouldn't even know.
Kaffee: Are you Markinson?
Lt. Weinberg: No.
Kaffee: I'm not Markinson... that's two.

Amanda Beckett: Hi, umm... Do you happen to know who Preston Myers is?
Earth Girl: D'uh. He only sat like, right next to you in freshman English. But I guess you wouldn't remember that. I mean, why would Amanda Beckett pay any attention to a unique spirit like Preston, or even a unique spirit like me? Maybe it's because she's a little busy ordering around her little conformist flock of sheep. SHEEP! You are all sheep! Baaaaah!

Did you know that I was struck by lightning seven times?

Mr. Daws

Terry Benedict: Think he's gonna fall for this?
Danny Ocean: You did. You ready?
Terry Benedict: I was born ready.
Danny Ocean: [rolls his eyes]

Jake Sully: Look, I know you probably don't undertstand this... but, thank you.
Neytiri: [Ignores him and speaks in Na'vi]
Jake Sully: Thank you.
Neytiri: [Speaks in Na'vi]
Jake Sully: That was pretty impressive. I would have been screwed if you hadn't come along.
[Neytiri stands up and leaves. Jake follows her]
Jake Sully: Hey, wait a second! Where are you going? Wait up! Just, hey, slow down! I just wanted to say thanks for killing those things...
[Neytiri hits him with her bow]
Jake Sully: AH!Damn!
Neytiri: Don't thank. You don't thank for this! This is sad. Very sad only.
Jake Sully: Okay, okay. I'm sorry. Whatever I did, I'm sorry.
Neytiri: All this is your fault. They did not need to die.
Jake Sully: My fault? They attacked me! How am I the bad guy?
Neytiri: Your fault! Your fault.
Jake Sully: Easy. Easy...
Neytiri: You are like a baby. Making noise, don't know what to do.
Jake Sully: Fine. If you loved your little forest friends... why not let them kill me? What's the thinking?
Neytiri: Why save you?
Jake Sully: Yeah, why save me?
Neytiri: You have a strong heart. No fear. But stupid! Ignorant like a child!
[Neytiri walks away and Jake follows after her]
Jake Sully: Well, if I'm like a child, then maybe you should teach me.
Neytiri: Sky People can not learn, you do not see.
Jake Sully: Then teach me how to see.
Neytiri: No one can teach you to see.

Vance Wilder, Sr.: Where can I find Van Wilder?
Wasted Guy: In the Guinness Book of World-fucking-Records, man... under "Raddest Fucking Dude Alive"!
Vance Wilder, Sr.: Ok. Thanks.
Wasted Guy: In any one of these three rooms, Gramps.

Eggsy: Who are you?
Galahad: The man who got you released.

Jane Smith: Any last words?
John Smith: The new curtains are hideous.

From here you can get an excellent view of my foot.

Pai Mei

Are you seeing planes? Is your name Tattoo? Because I swear to God, you're living on Fantasy Island.

Doug Butabi

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