Welcome To Hotel Transylvania!

Dracula

Cole Trickle: Now can you walk, or am I gonna have to carry you?
Harry Hogge: Where to?
Cole Trickle: Victory Lane.
Harry Hogge: Walk? Hell... I'll race your ass.

Dr. Emmett Brown: Let me show you my plan for sending you home. Please excuse the crudity of this model, I didn't have time to build it to scale or to paint it.
[reveals intricate tabletop model of the town square]
Marty McFly: [impressed] It's good.

Festival Director: [translating] That's an endangered species at most. What would be the scientific purpose of killing it?
Steve Zissou: Revenge.

Danny: Hi.
Tess: Hi. We need to get Rusty a girl.
Rusty: There's a women's prison down the road.
Danny: [notices her wedding ring] You said that you sold this.
Tess: I said that.
Danny: Liar.
Tess: Thief.

Sherman Schrader: Right, you date Monica Morlan
Hoyt Ambrose: That I do
Sherman Schrader: Right, I think of her while I masturb...

Jack Byrnes: What are you guys doing in here?
Larry: Looks like rounding second base.

I promised them women.

Major Henry West


Goldie Wilson: No, sir! I'm gonna make something of myself. I'm going to night school. And one day I'm gonna be somebody!
Marty McFly: That's right, he's gonna be mayor!
Goldie Wilson: Yeah, I'm gonna... Mayor! Now that's a good idea! I can run for mayor.
Lou: A colored mayor, that'll be the day.
Goldie Wilson: You wait and see, Mr. Carruthers. I will be mayor! I'll be the most powerful man in Hill Valley. I'm gonna clean up this town.
Lou: Good. You can start by sweeping the floor.

How about if I wait six weeks to call. I could tell her I found her number while I was cleaning out my wallet, I can't remember where we met. I'll ask her what she looks like and then I'll ask her if we fucked. How about that? Would that be money?

Mike

I'm gonna get you Austin Powers! It's fricken freezing in here Mr. Bigglesworth.

Dr. Evil

Melissa: "Replacement Kicker Having a Great Year." "Ready For Super Bowl, All-Star Kicker Boasts."
Ace Ventura: "Field Goal Sails Wide. Dolphins Lose Super Bowl."
Melissa: The "Kick Heard Round The World." That was Finkle. The Dolphins lost by one point.
[Ace lets out an impressed whistle. Melissa flips to the next clipping, with a headline that reads "Finkle Contract Not Renewed."]
Melissa: Poor guy.
Ace Ventura: Poor guy with a motive, baby.

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