[after you are the music in me, and into a walkie talkie] Golden throat, this is Jazz square, we may have a problem.

Ryan Evans

Okay, now we will only be able to do this if we all work together.

Troy Bolton

Detective Krevoy: So you admit it?
Ted: Guilty as charged. I'm not gonna play games with you. I could give you a song and dance but what's the point? I did it and we all know it. The hitcher himself told me it's illegal. The irony.
Detective Krevoy: Well, uh, can you tell us his name?
Ted: Jeez, I didn't catch it.
Detective Stabler: So he was a stranger? It was totally random?
Ted: He was the first hitcher I saw, what can I tell you? Now cut to the chase, how much trouble am I in?
Detective Stabler: First tell us why you did it.
Ted: Why I did it? I don't know. Boredom? I thought I was doing the guy a favor.
Detective Krevoy: This wasn't your first time, was it, Ted? How many we talking?
Ted: Hitchhikers? I don't know - 50... 100 maybe - Who keeps track? Hey, I know this is the Bible Belt, but where I come from this is not that big a deal.
Detective Krevoy: You son of a bitch! You're gonna fry!

So it turns out there's life on other planets. Boy, this is really going to change the Miss Universe contest, you know what I mean?

Jay Leno

I'm Thomas Cub. It's my birthday today.

Thomas

Hippie Student: [Kumar trying to buy pot] Here, that's sixt - 80 bucks.
Kumar: 80 bucks?
Hippie Student: Yeah, 80 bucks.
Kumar: Yo, this is worth 40 tops bro!
Hippie Student: Bro? I'm not your bro, bro. ok, and that's 80 bucks. You don't feel like getting high tonight? If you don't feel like getting high, that's cool with me because there's lots of people around here. See this guy? Hey, what's up, George? I smoke buds with George all the time.
Kumar: What kind of a hippie are you?
Hippie Student: What kind of hippie am I? Man, I'm a business hippie, I understand the concept of supply and demand.

It is interesting the many ways you and I overlap; you're the youngest of three James boys, I'm the youngest of five Ford boys. You have blue eyes, I have blue eyes. You're five feet eight inches tall, I'm five feet eight inches tall.

Robert Ford

[of Mr. Smith] Even if that guy was charming and funny, I still wouldn't like him.

Marshall

Nicky: I cannot believe you lied to me.
Jess: You can't believe I lied?
Nicky: I can't believe it.
Jess: Oh, that's so rich from you.
Nicky: That's what you want to say to me?
Jess: Yeah, cause you're always lying, Nicky, and now we're dead.

Kurt Kelly: Hey Ram, doesn't this cafeteria have a no fags allowed rule?
J.D.: Well, they seem to have an open door policy for assholes though don't they?

Twenty-five seats, given to orphans. Perfect. Now my nightmare is complete.

Charles Frohman

Valentine McKee: Come on you two, let's go, we're headed for the mountains!
Burt Gummer: [Grabs a bag of weapons] If that's how we're doin it, we're going prepared!

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