So this is planet Houston.

General Zod

Simon: Where are my pigeons now?
Inspector Cobb: Pigeons?
Simon: I had two pigeons, bright and gay, fly for me the other day. Why is it they did go? You cannot tell, you do not know.
Inspector Cobb: You mean McClane?
Simon: No, I mean Santa Claus.

Tugg Speedman: Now, let's go get those Viet Congs.
[cocks his gun]
Alpa Chino: "Viet Cong!"
Tugg Speedman: What?
Alpa Chino: It's "viet cong." There's no "s," it's already plural. You wouldn't say "Chineses..."

Rabbi Jake Schram: Oy.
Father Brian Finn: Amen to your oy.

Chattar Lal: Dr. Jones, the eminent archaeologist?
Willie: Hard to believe, isn't it?

Sydney: Hey check out these, too. That guy needs to fart.
Peter: That guy seems to be clenching.

Fuck this weed is good.


I barely recognize this country anymore, the government has us seeing communists in our soup.

Dean Charles Stanforth

Theoden: Crops can be re-sown, homes re-built. Within these walls... we will outlast them.
Aragorn: They do not come to destroy Rohan's crops or villages. They come to destroy its people. Down to the last child.
Theoden: What will you have me do? Look at my men. Their courage hangs by a thread.

Lucky Day: Well, we're just gonna have to use our brains.
Ned Nederlander, Dusty Bottoms: Damn it!

It's dangerous to confuse children with angels.

Thurston Howell

Mr. Potato Head: Can we stop? My parts are killing me.
Buzz Lightyear: How about a quick roll call? Everybody here?
Mr. Potato Head: Not everybody.
Buzz Lightyear: Who's behind?
Slinky Dog: Mine...

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