Yvaine: Are you tempted?
Tristan: Tempted, by what?
Yvaine: Immortality. Let's say it wasn't my heart. Not me. Just a star you didn't know.
Tristan: You seriously think I could kill anybody. Even if I could, I mean, everlasting life? I imagine it would be kind of lonely. Well, maybe if you had someone to share it with. Someone you loved. Then it might be different.

People, when you do find that special somebody, you gotta hold that man, hold that woman! Love him, please him, squeeze her, please her! Signify your feelings with every gentle caress, because it's so important to have that special somebody to hold, to kiss, to miss, to squeeze, and please!


Buzz: I've set my laser from stun to kill.
Woody: Oh, great. If anyone attacks we can blink em' to death.

I'm not sure what four nines does, but the ace, I think, is pretty high.


Taj: Doesn't she have a boyfriend?
Van Wilder: Details. Only details.

Lou Bloom: Will this be on television?
Joe Loder: Morning news, if it bleeds it leads
Lou Bloom: Are you currently hiring?

[beating Carl] Fucking little weasel! Fuck you! You fucking motherfucker son of a bitch! Fucking cock! Jesus Christ! You fucking shitbag motherfucker!

Shep Proudfoot

Emma: Congrats? For what, having sex with you?
Adam: You did a good job, so... I thought you deserved a balloon.

They said I need acting lessons. Can you believe that? A soap opera told me I need acting lessons.

Mary Jane

Johnny Rico: I hear you got a bug problem ma'am?
Corporal Birdie: Ah, stuff it, Rico!

Things will go on, and then one day it will all be over.


Rosco: [after a take] We're really rolling, Mr. Simpson.
R.F. Simpson: Well, you can stop rolling at once.
Rosco: What?
R.F. Simpson: Don, Lina.
Rosco: Ok, everybody save it!
R.F. Simpson: Save it? Tell them to go home. We're shutting down for a few weeks.
Rosco: What?
R.F. Simpson: Well, don't just stand there. Tell them!
Rosco: Everybody go until further notice! What is it?

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