My parents wanted to move me into high school out of the sixth grade, but we decided to chuck the idea because I'd have trouble making friends, blah, blah, blah. Now blah, blah, blah is all I ever do. I use my grand IQ to decide what color lip gloss to wear in the morning and how to hit three keggers before curfew...

Veronica Sawyer

Anywhere you go, all around the world, all the best cooks are men.

Lefty Ruggiero

Maggie Fitzgerald: She's tough, I can't go inside, I can't get close enough to hit her.
Frankie Dunn: You know why that is?
Maggie Fitzgerald: Why?
Frankie Dunn: Cause she's a better fighter than you are, that's why. She's younger, she's stronger, and she's more experienced. Now, what are you gonna do about it?

One Two: Well what do you want?
Stella: You.
One Two: Well you had better come in then.

I will serve you in your campaign until you have a victory.

Iorek Byrnison

Superman: I'm here to fight for truth, and justice, and the American way.
Lois Lane: [laughs] You're gonna end up fighting every elected official in this country!

POLICE BRUTALITYYY! POLICE BRUTALITYYYYYY!

Tracy Turnblad

Tai: Hey, did you see that?
Cher: Ugh. Skateboards. That's like so five years ago.


Carl Showalter: Alright Jerry, you got the phone to yourself?
Jerry Lundegaard: Well, yeah.
Carl Showalter: You know who this is?
Jerry Lundegaard: Well, yeah, I got an idea. How's that Sierra working out for ya?
Carl Showalter: Circumstances have changed, Jerry.
Jerry Lundegaard: Well, what do ya mean?
Carl Showalter: Thing have changed, circumstances Jerry, beyond the uh acts of god.
Jerry Lundegaard: How's Jean?
Carl Showalter: Who's Jean?
Jerry Lundegaard: My wife! What the?
Carl Showalter: Oh she's alright, but there's a few people in Brainerd who aren't so ok I'll tell you that.
Jerry Lundegaard: What the heck are ya talking about? Let's just finish this deal up here.
Carl Showalter: Blood has been Jerry.
Jerry Lundegaard: What the heck do ya mean?
Carl Showalter: Three people, in Brainerd.
Jerry Lundegaard: Oh jeez.
Carl Showalter: That's right we need more money.
Jerry Lundegaard: What the heck are ya talking about? What do you fellas have yourself mixed up in?
Carl Showalter: We need more money...
Jerry Lundegaard: [interrupting] This was supposed to be a no rough stuff type deal!
Carl Showalter: [angry] DON'T EVER INTERRUPT ME JERRY, JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Jerry Lundegaard: Well I'm sorry but I just- I don't
Carl Showalter: I'm not gonna debate you Jerry! I'm not gonna debate! We now want the entire 80,00!
Jerry Lundegaard: Oh for christ's sake here!

This is so antiseptic. It's empty. Why do you think this is funny? You're going by audience reaction? This is an audience that's raised on television, their standards have been systematically lowered over the years. These guys sit in front of their sets and the gamma rays eat the white cells of their brains out!

Isaac Davis

Steve's gotta go drain the sea-monster.

Steve the Pirate

The question is not whether I've treated you rudely but whether you've ever heard me treat anyone else better.

Professor Henry Higgins

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