Mowgli: Hello. What are you doing?
Junior: Shh. Drillin'.
Mowgli: Can I do it, too?
Junior: Sure, just do what I do. But don't talk in ranks. It's against regulations.

Dean 'MF' Jones: "Most killers are first timers. You want to pull off a brilliant murder, you've gotta act like it's an accident. If you do it right, you ain't even gotta be there when it goes down."
Nick: "How are we supposed to fake three accidents?"
Dean 'MF' Jones: "You stalk your prey. You've gotta be smart: find out where they live, find out their habits - what's their hobbies, what they like, what type of food they like. Even if you pull it off perfectly, you crackers got motives. The 'po-po'
Kurt (whispers to Dale): "That means police."
Dean 'MF' Jones: "...will still put it to you."
Nick: "We all have clear motives for killing our bosses, so this is not gonna work - this is garbage."
Dean 'MF' Jones: "Why don't you kill each others bosses?"
Kurt: "That's actually a good idea. Yeah like Hitchcock's 'Strangers on a Train,' right?"
Dale: "The Danny DeVito movie - it's a funny one!"
Kurt: "The famous Alfred Hitchcock/Danny DeVito movie..." (slaps Dale) "that's the one."

Harry: So you got fired again, eh?
Lloyd: Oh yeah. They always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident, you know?
Harry: Yeah, well, I lost my job too.
Lloyd: Man, you are one pathetic loser. No offense.
Harry: No, none taken. You know what really chaps my ass though? I spent my life savings turning my van into a dog. The alarm alone cost me two hundred.
Lloyd: Hey, chicks love it. It's a shaggin' wagon.

Oseary Drakoulias: I spoke with Larry Amin, and it's a pass.
Steve Zissou: In other words, you fucked us!
Oseary Drakoulias: Let's not cast stones at one another, my dear.

Woody: [in Bonnie's room; she is playing with her toys and Woody]
[voice box]
Woody: There's a snake in my boot!
[Bonnie pulls his string again]
Woody: I'd like to join your posse, boys, but first I'm gonna sing a little song.
Bonnie: A sheriff!
[she sets Woody down at a table surrounded by stuffed animals]
Bonnie: Move over, Mr. Pricklepants!
[she pushes him aside]
Bonnie: We have a guest!
[she hops from foot to foot]
Bonnie: You want some coffee?
[she sets out cups and pretends to pour from a pitcher]
Bonnie: It's good for you, but don't drink too much or you'll have to - Be right back!
[she runs out the door]
Woody: [Woody looks around, the other toys are still frozen] Pssst! Hey! Hello! Can you tell me where I am?
Mr. Pricklepants: Shh!
[he freezes again]
Buttercup: The guy's just asking a question.
Mr. Pricklepants: Well, excuse me! I am trying to stay in character!
Buttercup: [to Woody] My name's Buttercup.
Mr. Pricklepants: [at Buttercup] Shh!
Trixie: I'm Trixie!
Mr. Pricklepants: [at Trixie] Shhh!
Trixie: [back at him] Shhh!
Woody: [waves his arms] Guys, hey! Look, I don't know where I am...
Trixie: We're either in a cafe in Paris or a coffee shop in New Jersey.
Buttercup: We do a lot of improv here. Just stay loose, have fun, and you'll be fine!

Mike McDermott: Uh, you know what? I got my five grand here. That's just fine by me. I'm going home.
Teddy KGB: Fine. It's a fucking joke anyway. After all, I am paying you with your money.
Mike McDermott: What did you say?
Teddy KGB: Your money... I am still up grand... from this last time I stick it in you.
Mike McDermott: [Narrating] They're trying to goad me, trying to own me. But this isn't a gunfight. It's not about pride or ego. It's only about money. I can leave now, even with Grama and KGB... and halfway to paying Petrovsky back. That's the safe play. I told Worm you can't lose what you don't put in the middle. But you can't win much either.
Mike McDermott: Deal.

Glen: Hi I'm Glen. Guess how many fingers I have?
Gary: Ten.
Glen: No. I have eight and two thumbs.

Plainview: You're not the chosen brother, Eli. It was Paul who was chosen. You see, he found me and told me about your land. You're just a fool.
Eli Sunday: Why are you talking about Paul? Don't say this to me.
Plainview: I did what your brother couldn't. I broke you and I beat you. It was Paul who told me about you. He's the prophet. He's the smart one. He knew what was there and he found me to take it out of the ground, and you know what the funny thing is? Listen... listen... listen... I paid him ten thousand dollars, cash in hand, just like that. He has his own company now. A prosperous little business. Three wells producing. Five thousand dollars a week.
[Eli cries]
Plainview: Stop crying, you sniveling ass! Stop your nonsense. You're just the afterbirth, Eli.
Eli Sunday: No...
Plainview: You slithered out of your mother's filth.
Eli Sunday: No.
Plainview: They should have put you in a glass jar on a mantlepiece. Where were you when Paul was suckling at your mother's teat? Where were you? Who was nursing you, poor Eli- one of Bandy's sows? That land has been had. Nothing you can do about it. It's gone. It's had. You lose.
Eli Sunday: If you would just take this lease, Daniel...
Plainview: Drainage! Drainage, Eli, you boy. Drained dry. I'm so sorry. Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw. There it is, that's a straw, you see? You watching?. And my straw reaches acroooooooss the room, and starts to drink your milkshake... I... drink... your... milkshake!
[sucking sound]
Plainview: I drink it up!
Eli Sunday: Don't bully me, Daniel!
[Daniel roars and throws Eli across the room]
Plainview: Did you think your song and dance and your superstition would help you, Eli? I am the Third Revelation! I am who the Lord has chosen!

[half time speech] Perfection is being able to look your friends in the eye and know you did everything you could not to let them down.

Coach Gary Gaines

Detective Remy Bressant: Corwin Earle. Serial molester, recently work-release. Went AWOL around the time Amanda disappeared.
Nick Poole: Known associates - Leon Trett and his handsome wife, Roberta. The Tretts were released six and eight months ago, respectively. They have drug habits. We don't know where they are, but we think Corwin's with them. Jailhouse snitch claims that Corwin confided in him and told him when he got out, he was gonna move in with his family. Apparently, the three of them have some kind of Addams Family deal going on.
Detective Remy Bressant: Corwin's plan is to keep a kid in the house to have sex with.
Patrick Kenzie: Well, that sounds promising.
Detective Remy Bressant: Not for Amanda, it doesn't.
Angie Gennaro: Do you think this is who has Amanda?
Nick Poole: Well, there's a lot of holes in our theory. I mean, Corwin likes little boys, you know? He likes them seven or eight or nine.

[narrating] Walt Whitman once said, "I see great things in baseball. It's our game, the American game. It will repair our losses and be a blessing to us." You could look it up.

Annie Savoy

It's called reading! Top to bottom, left to right... a group of words together is called a sentence. Take Tylenol for any headaches... Midol for any cramps.

Richard Hayden

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