Rick Vaughn: What's that shit on your chest?
Eddie Harris: Crisco? Bardol? Vagisil. Any one of them will give you another two to three inches drop on your curve ball. Of course if the umps are watching me real close I'll rub a little jalapeño up my nose, get it running, and if I need to load the ball up I just... wipe my nose.

Danny: Can I get a large black coffee?
Barista: A what?
Danny: Large black coffee.
Barista: Do you mean a venti?
Danny: No, I mean a large.
Barista: Venti is large.
Danny: No venti is twenty. Large is large. In fact tall is large and grande is spanish for large. Venti is the only one that doesn't mean large. It's also the only one that's italian. Congratulations you're stupid in three languages.
Barista: A venti is a large coffee.
Danny: Really says who: Fellini? Do you accept lira or is it all euros now?

Did everyone see that? Because I will *not* be doing it again.

Captain Jack Sparrow

[after he pricks Tony with his badge] Sorry, it's funny how annoying a little prick can be.

Senator Stern

Dare you take a leap of faith? Or become an old man, filled with regret, waiting to die alone.


Gimli: Never thought I'd die fighting side by side with an Elf.
Legolas: What about side by side with a friend?
Gimli: Aye. I could do that.

Mac: But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun!
Thorny: [referring to Farva] Yeah, and his shenanigans are cruel and tragic.
Foster: [after a pause] Which... makes them not really shenanigans at all.
Mac: [in a silly voice] Evil shenanigans!

I didn't come here to tell you that I can't live without you. I can live without you. I just don't want to.


Bryan: Wake up! I need you to be focused!
[stabs Marko in the legs with metal rods]
Bryan: Are you focused yet?

Isabella Swan: So what your saying is, I'm your brand of heroin?
Edward Cullen: Yes, you are exactly my brand of heroin.

You people voted for Hubert Humphrey, and you killed Jesus.

Raoul Duke

Lewis Bodine: We never found anything on Jack... there's no record of him at all.
Old Rose: No, there wouldn't be, would there? And I've never spoken of him until now... Not to anyone... Not even your grandfather... A woman's heart is a deep ocean of secrets. But now you know there was a man named Jack Dawson and that he saved me... in every way that a person can be saved. I don't even have a picture of him. He exists now... only in my memory.

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