Captain: 12:30? AUTO, why didn't you wake me for morning announcements? Honestly, it's the one thing I get to do on this ship.
[Resets the ship back to morning]
Captain: Well, good morning, everybody, and welcome to day 255,642 aboard the Axiom. As always, the weather is a balmy 72 degrees and sunny, and, uh... Oh, I see the ship's log is showing that today is the 700th anniversary of our five year cruise. Well, I'm sure our forefathers would be proud to know that 700 years later we'd be... doing the exact same thing they were doing. So, be sure next mealtime to ask for your free sep-tua-centennial cupcake in a cup. Wow, look at that.

Chunk: How's this?
Mikey: Oh, you idiot! You glued it on upside-down!
Brandon Walsh: If God made it that way, you'd all be pissing in your faces!
Chunk: Looks fine to me.

Chili Palmer: [about a Honda Insight] It's the Cadillac of hybrids.
Martin Weir: But what about speed?
Chili Palmer: If you're important, people will wait.

Our target for this year's purge is hiding in your home. You have one hour to find him and give him to us or we will kill all of you. We will be coming in.

Polite Leader

Dewey Finn: Look the first thing you do when you start a band is talk about your influences. That's how you figure out what kind of band you want to be. So who do you like? Blondie?
Marta: Christina Aguilera
Dewey Finn: Who? No. Come on. What? You, Shortstop.
Leonard: Puff Daddy
Dewey Finn: Wrong. Billy?
Billy: Liza Minnelli?

God, I hate those fuckin' kids

White Bitch

I need high cellings

Deirdre Burroughs

Redrum. Redrum. Redrum.

Danny Torrance

Carl Showalter: Who the fuck are you? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?
Wade Gustafson: I got your damn money; now where's my daughter?
Carl Showalter: I am through fucking around here. Drop that fucking briefcase!
Wade Gustafson: Where's my daughter?
Carl Showalter: Fuck you, man! Where's Jerry? I gave simple fucking instructions.
Wade Gustafson: Where's my damn daughter? No Jean, no money!
Carl Showalter: Drop that fucking money!
Wade Gustafson: No Jean, no money!
Carl Showalter: Is this a fucking joke here? [shoots Wade] Happy now, asshole? What's with you people? Ya fucking imbeciles!

Copeland: Now you listen to me, and you listen good. I don't give a damn which way you go, just don't follow me. You got that?
Dr. Richard Kimble: Yeah. [pauses] Hey, Copeland. Be good.

[to Joel] Are you ready for me... Ralph?


Hans: Put down the gun, and give me my detonators.
John McClane: Well, well, well... Hans.
Hans: Put it down now.
John McClane: That was pretty tricky with that accent. You oughta be on fucking TV with that accent. But what do you want with the detonators, Hans? I already used all the explosives. Or did I?

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