That's too much power for one man to have.

Captain Green

[consoling Mickey Hart after an embarrasing play] There's a bunch of cameras out there right now waiting to make a joke of this, Mick. So you can either stop, give them the sound bite, do the dance. Or you can hold your head up and walk by, and the next time we're in Boston, we'll go out there and work the wall together. Don't help them make a joke out of you.

Billy Chapel

I'm just a little anxious to get up there and whoop E.T.'s ass.

Captain Steven Hiller

Jake: What the hell is this? Chick food?
Melanie Carmichael: Light beer. Less calories.

[about Dana, after Roy broke his nose]
Roy Eberhardt: I wrote him a note, that should be the end of it.
Garrett: A note? That's adorable. What did you say? "I'm sorry I smoked you. Please don't break every bone in my body. Please leave me one good arm so I can feed myself"?
Roy Eberhardt: You're hysterical.

Austin Powers: Smashing, Basil. A pimp-mobile.
Basil Exposition: Yes, yes. I knew it would tickle YOUR fancy.
Austin Powers: What can I say?

I love the stories. You know, about fallin' in love, and having love knock you around, and then the pressures of the world on you so tough it makes you feel small. You just want to give your soul to God. You might as well, your ass belongs to him.

Ray Charles

Rolfe: [narrating a "telegram" for Liesl] Dear Liesl, I would like to tell you how I feel about you STOP Unfortunately, this wire is already too expensive Sincerely, Rolfe
Liesl: [sounded offended] Sincerely?
Rolfe: Cordially?
Liesl: [turning away] Cordially?
Rolfe: Affectionately?
[Liesl smiles and throws her arms around his neck]

Chaucer: Are you mad? You knowingly endanger a member of the royal family?
William: He knowingly endangers himself.

Justice: Hi, I'm Justice.
Jay: And I'm so fucking yours.

By the hymen of Olivia Newton-John!

Ron Burgundy

Roger Thornhill: What's wrong with men like me?
Eve Kendall: They don't believe in marriage.
Roger Thornhill: I've been married twice.
Eve Kendall: See what I mean?

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