Mrs. Gloop: Where is my son? Where does that pipe go to?
Willy Wonka: That pipe happens to go to a room where I make the most delicious kind of strawberry-flavoured chocolate-coated fudge.
Mrs. Gloop: Then he will be made into strawberry-flavoured chocolate-coated fudge? They'll be selling him by the pound all over the world?
Willy Wonka: No, I wouldn't allow it. The taste would be terrible. Can you imagine Augustus-flavoured chocolate-coated Gloop? Ew. No one would buy it.

Don't open my pantry, Father. I found one of them in there and I locked him in.

Ray Reddy

Tristan: You sort of - glitter now. Is it... Is it normal?
Yvaine: Let's see if you can work it out for youself. What do stars do?
Tristan: Hmm... Attract trouble?
[Yvaine pushes him, amused]
Tristan: [grinning] All right, I'm sorry. Let me do another guess. Is it: Do they know exactly how to annoy a boy called Tristan Thorn?

Hey Dad, I'm going to my room with three strange men.

Invisible Boy

Look, Left, I said I knew him. I didn't say I fucked him.

Jilly

Men... Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.

Leslie

No, that's a bear in a, in a bee costume.

Meg Swan

Joey: Hey Tony, Double J's been in the car 25 minutes with some chick!
Tony Manero: So?
Joey: So, I can't get the selfish prick out!

I want bowel cancer.

Narrator

Incoming reports show this year's Purge has been the most succesful to date, with the most murders committed.

Newscaster

Tardy slip for you, Miss Parker. And one for you, McFly. I believe that makes four in a row. Now let me give you a nickel's worth of free advice, young man. This so-called Dr. Brown is dangerous, he's a real nutcase. You hang around with him, you're gonna end up in big trouble.

Mr. Strickland

Airline Employee: Aisle or window, smoking or non?
Otto: What was the part in the middle?

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