Now that I've met you, would you object to never seeing me again?

Claudia Wilson Gator

Lewis: Why is your dog wearing glasses?
Grandpa Bud: Oh, because his insurance won't pay for contacts.

Brandt: The rope isn't long enough!
Ethan: No (expletive)!
Brandt: You're not gonna make it!
Ethan: You're not helping.

Stacey Pilgrim: Next time, we don't date the girl with eleven evil ex-boyfriends.
Scott Pilgrim: Seven.
Stacey Pilgrim: Well, that's not that bad.

Randal Graves. You work here too? Jesus, anyone else from our graduating class back there?

Lance Dowds

[calms Holly] Every morning I still wake up and the first thing I want to do is to see your face.

Gerry Kennedy

Grandpa: So are you gettin' any?
Dwayne: [shakes his head no]
Grandpa: Christ! What are you? 15? You gotta be gettin' that young stuff!

Schmidt: You guys called the cops to get your Frisbee out of the pond? Is this really a police matter?
Jenko: [goes to hand Frisbee back to the boy, turns around and throws it back in the pond]
Jenko: Get your own (expletive) Frisbee!

Royal: Can I say something to you, Henry?
Henry Sherman: Okay.
Royal: I've always been considered an asshole for about as long as I can remember. Uhh, that's just my style. But I'd really feel blue if I didn't think you were going to forgive me.
Henry Sherman: I don't think you're an asshole, Royal, I just think you're kind of a son of a bitch.
Royal: Well, I really appreciate that.

If you think that Mick Jagger will still be doing the whole rock star thing at age 50, well, then, you are sorely, sorely mistaken.

Dennis Hope

Nothing's ever for sure, John. That's the only sure thing I do know.

Charles

Charlie Townsend: Women are always under the impression that men love them more that they really do.
Kitty Fane: I wouldn't delude myself for a second that you were in love with me.
Charlie Townsend: Now there you're wrong.

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