I haven't laughed that hard since I was a little girl. Thank you.

Dr. Evil

Dolores Umbridge: Your previous instruction in this subject has been disturbingly uneven. But you will be pleased to know from now on, you will be following a carefully structured, Ministry-approved course of defensive magic. Yes?
Hermione Granger: There's nothing in here about using defensive spells.
Dolores Umbridge: Using spells? Ha ha! Well I can't imagine why you would need to use spells in my classroom.
Ron Weasley: We're not gonna use magic?
Dolores Umbridge: You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way.
Harry Potter: Well, what use is that? If we're gonna be attacked it won't be risk-free.
Dolores Umbridge: Students will raise their hands when they speak in my class.
[pauses]
Dolores Umbridge: It is the view of the Ministry that a theoretical knowledge will be sufficient to get you through your examinations, which after all, is what school is all about.
Harry Potter: And how is theory supposed to prepare us for what's out there?
Dolores Umbridge: There is nothing out there, dear! Who do you imagine would want to attack children like yourself?
Harry Potter: I don't know, maybe, Lord Voldemort!

I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is.

Derek Zoolander

Cecile Caldwell: This sure doesn't taste like an iced tea.
Sebastian: It's from Long Island.

Margaret Tate: [surprised to see Andrew at her office] Why are you panting?
Andrew Paxton: Cause I've been running.
Margaret Tate: From Alaska?

This was no boat accident!

Hooper

Willy Wonka: What do you think about little raspberry kites?
Charlie Bucket: With licorice instead of string!
Mrs. Bucket: Boys, no business at the dinner table.
Charlie Bucket: Sorry, Mum.
Willy Wonka: I think you're onto something though, Charlie.

[with arms around Jack] C'mon now, you're sleepin' on your feet like a horse. My mama used to say that to me when I was little. And sing to me...

Ennis Del Mar

Joey Naylor: Dad, why is the American government the best government?
Nick Naylor: Because of our endless appeals system.

Kevin: Well, you're all I think about.
Leslie: Me?
Kevin: And I think the reason I'm not interested in other women, and why I haven't had sex in so long, is because I'm desperately, completely in love with you.

Sévérine: How much do you know about fear?
James Bond: All there is.
Sévérine: Well, not like this... Not like him...

Why would my picture wind up on a missing person's website?

Nathan

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