A few years ago, I had a dream. It began in the summer and was over by the following spring. In between, there were as many unhappy nights as there were happy days. Most of them took place in this café. And then one night, a door slammed and the dream was over.

Jeremy

Mr. President, you've got bigger problems than losing me. You just lost my vote.

Sydney Ellen Wade

It feels like I'm drinking out of Chewbacca's Dick!

Alex Eilhauer

Sam: What you got?
Andrew Largeman: I got a little buzz going
[pauses]
Andrew Largeman: and I like you.
[Sam, embarassed, giggles]
Andrew Largeman: So there's that. I guess I have that.
Sam: I can tap-dance. You wanna see me tap-dance?
Andrew Largeman: I would love to see you tap-dance.

What are you looking at? Huh? I'll kick your fucking ass, right now! What are you smiling at? Freshman faggot!

O'Bannion

Some people just don't understand boundaries.

Puss in Boots

Mr. Morgan: Get outta my class.
Kat Stratford: What?
Mr. Morgan: Out. Get out!
Joey: Thanks, Mr. Morgan.
Mr. Morgan: Shut up!

Eddie: They're armed.
Soap: What was that? Armed? What do you mean armed? Armed with what?
Eddie: Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster... what do you think they're gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit!

Stay scared.

Mike Enslin

Jack: Listen, man. Cammi gets off in an hour, so I was thinking I'd just hang around and have a drink, and make sure she gets home safe.
Miles Raymond: You're joking, right?
Jack: No.
Miles Raymond: Un-fucking-believable. Can't we just... go back to the motel... and hang out... and get up early, play 9 holes of golf... before we head home?
Jack: [puts his hand on Miles' shoulder] Listen, man. You're my friend, and I know you care about me. And I know you disapprove, and I respect that. But there are some things that I have to do that you don't understand. You understand literature, movies, wine... but you don't understand my plight.

Gill: My first escape. Landed on dentist tools. I was aiming for the toilet.
Nemo: The toilet?
Gill: All drains lead to the ocean, kid.
Nemo: Wow. How may times have you tried to get out?
Gill: Ah, I lost count.

[seeing Alice Cooper] Ugliest woman I've ever seen.

Barnabas Collins

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