[answers phone] Buddy the Elf! What's your favorite color?Buddy
When did I get stabbed?! That's awesome!Schmidt
Alan Garner: Hey Phil, look!
[laughs hysterically while miming the baby masturbating]
Alan Garner: He's jackin' his little weenus!
Phil Wenneck: Pull yourself together, bro!
Alan Garner: Not at the table, Carlos!
Who is Keyser Soze? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew. That was his power.Verbal
[about to fight Bao Thao]
Gunnar Jensen: Bring it, "happy feet"!
Daisy: You're so young.
Benjamin Button: Only on the outside.
First person that comes out this fucking door gets a... gets a *lead salad*, you understand?Narrator
Alonzo Harris: No, not your story. A story. Because you can't keep your mouth shut long enough for me to read my paper. Tell me a story.
Jake Hoyt: I don't think I know any stories.
Alonzo Harris: You don't know any stories? Okay, I'll tell you a story. This is a newspaper. It's 90 per cent bullshit, but it's entertaining. That's why I read it, because it entertains me. You won't let me read it, so you entertain me with your bullshit. Tell me a story, right now.
Sebastian: I have a reputation to uphold.
Kathryn: Oh, but diddling the therapist's is a challenge.
Sebastian: She was overcharging.
Ultron: How do you hope to stop me?
Tony Stark: Like the old man said, Together.
You look surprised to see me, again, Mr. Anderson. That's the difference between us. I've been *expecting* you.Agent Smith
Ed Hocken: You might end up dead!
Frank Drebin: "You might end up dead" is my middle name.
Ed Hocken: What about Jane?
Frank Drebin: I don't know her middle name.