Mike Teavee: Why is everything here completely pointless?
Charlie Bucket: Candy doesn't have to have a point. That's why it's candy.

I am a rooster illusion.

Tugg Speedman

We are an independent international intelligence agency operating at the highest level of discretion. The Kingsmen agents are the new knights.

Galahad

A drug dealer? No. Did he sell a little weed? Yeah.

Sonny Truelove

You want to save your own life, but you don't know how to take one. Give it to someone who knows how to take one. Give me the damn thing so I can do what you shoulda did ten minutes ago.

Tattooed Prisoner

Seven schools in seven states and the only thing different is my locker combination.

J.D.

Chad: Is it the eggs?
Dylan: It's not the eggs.
Chad: Is it the boat?
Dylan: No, it's not the boat, I have to go though.
Chad: Is it the Chad?
Dylan: It might be the Chad.
Chad: The Chad... It's the Chad!
[Chad falls into the water]

Princess Fiona: You didn't slay the dragon?
Shrek: It's on my "to do" list. Now come on.
Princess Fiona: But this isn't right. You're meant to charge in, sword drawn, banner flying-that's what all the other knights did.
Shrek: Yeah, right before they burst into flames.

Narrator: Tyler, you are by far the most interesting single-serving friend I've ever met... see I have this thing: everything on a plane is single-serving...
Tyler Durden: Oh I get it, it's very clever.
Narrator: Thank you.
Tyler Durden: How's that working out for you?
Narrator: What?
Tyler Durden: Being clever.
Narrator: Great.
Tyler Durden: Keep it up then... Right up.

You'd better get it up, or I'm gonna have to kill you!

Batty

We're just like Kevin Bacon.

Gamora

Let us go get the shit kicked out of us by love.

Sam

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