Is there any way you could lend me some money? Maybe... 20 million dollars?

General Aladeen

It ain't easy having pals.

Charley Bowdre

Ernie McCracken: It all comes down to this roll. Roy Munson, a man-child, with a dream to topple bowling giant Ernie McCracken. If he strikes, he's the 1979 Odor-Eaters Champion. He's got one foot in the frying pan and one in the pressure cooker. Believe me, as a bowler, I know that right about now, your bladder feels like an overstuffed vacuum cleaner bag and your butt is kinda like an about-to-explode bratwurst.
Roy: Hey. Do you mind? I wasn't talking when you were bowling.
Ernie McCracken: Was I talking out loud? Was I? Sorry. Good luck.

It's all just... cornflakes.

Morty

Its funny because he's fat!

Mr. Chow

It's like the Titanic but with bears!

Jackie Moon

It's not "show friends." It's show *business*.

Bob Sugar

It's time for me to go. But I would rather stay.

Abraham Lincoln

Ringo Starr: I've got a song about an octopus.
John Lennon: 'I've got a song about an octupus'. Why don't you jam it up your ass?

I've got jelly beans for teeth!

Cal Deveraux

I've gotten used to ignoring them and I think, as a result, they've kind of given up on me. I think that's what it's like with all our dreams and our nightmares, Martin, we've got to keep feeding them for them to stay alive.

Nash

Combatant: Just imagine 16 vests filled with ceramic ball bearings, slipping by every metal detector in your country.
Navy Seal Commander: And this is happening now?
Combatant: It's happening as we speak.

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