Hermione: Now, if you two don't mind, I'm going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed. Or worse, expelled.
Ron: She needs to sort out her priorities

Look at you. You're just a shade, a shade of my real wife. How could I capture all your beauty, your complexity, your perfection, your imperfection, in a dream? Yes, you're the best that I can do. But, I'm sorry, you're just not good enough.


[brutally beating Angel Face] I felt like putting a bullet between the eyes of every Panda that wouldn't screw to save its species. I wanted to open the dump valves on oil tankers and smother all the French beaches I'd never see. I wanted to breathe smoke.


Sometimes I wish I had never met you. Because then I could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there.


[clears throat] Well, I could be wrong, but I believe, uh, diversity is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.

Ron Burgundy

Jules: You scratch our back and we'll scratch yours.
Seth: Well, the funny thing about my back, is that it's located on my cock.

That ain't no etch-a-sketch. That's one doodle that can't be un-did, homeskillet.


Cal: When you have the stereo and the T.V. on at the same time, how do you control the volume on the T.V.?
Ricky: Why would you have the stereo and the T.V. on at the same time?
Cal: Because I like to party.

Driving Instructor: In America, a woman can choose who she has sex with.
Borat: Whaaaaat?

Landon: I might kiss you.
Jamie: I might be bad at it.
Landon: That's not possible.

Darth Vader: I've been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again, at last. The circle is now complete. When I met you I was but the learner. Now, *I* am the master.
Obi-Wan: Only a master of evil, Darth.

Jack Sparrow: Why is the rum gone?
Elizabeth: One: because it is a *vile* dring that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. Two: that signal is over a thousand feet high. The entire royal navy is out looking for me, do you think there is even the slightest chance they wont see it?
Jack Sparrow: But why is the rum gone?

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