It's got, ah, Ted Danson and Magnum P.I. and that Jewish actor...

Alan Garner

This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object.

The Joker

Imagine how many people out there are fuckin' right now man, just goin' at it.


Saul: Sick! You threw up in my printer!
Dale Denton: I did.
Saul: You break it?
Dale Denton: I hope not.

And whosoever shed man's blood, by man shall his blood be shed, for in the image of God made He man.

Il Duce

Gipsy! Give me your tears! If you will not give them to me, I will take them from you!


What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole... wheel of cheese? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing. How 'bout we get you in your p.j.'s and we hit the hay.

Ron Burgundy [to Baxter]

Economics Teacher: Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?
Simone: Um, he's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious.

Jack: Rose, you're no picnic, all right? You're a spoiled little brat, even, but under that, you're the most amazingly, astounding, wonderful girl, woman that I've ever known...
Rose: Jack, I...
Jack: No, let me try and get this out. You're ama- I'm not an idiot, I know how the world works. I've got ten bucks in my pocket, I have no-nothing to offer you and I know that. I understand. But I'm too involved now. You jump, I jump remember? I can't turn away without knowing you'll be all right... That's all I want.
Rose: Well, I'm fine... I'll be fine... really.
Jack: Really? I don't think so. They've got you trapped, Rose. And you're gonna die if you don't break free. Maybe not right away because you're strong but... sooner or later that fire that I love about you, Rose... that fire's gonna burn out...
Rose: It's not up to you to save me, Jack.
Jack: You're right... only you can do that.

Shrek: Ogres are like onions.
Donkey: They stink?
Shrek: Yes. No.
Donkey: Oh, they make you cry.
Shrek: No.
Donkey: Oh, you leave em out in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin' little white hairs.
Shrek: NO. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers.
Donkey: Oh, you both have layers. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions.

Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

Tyler Durden

We're meant to lose the people we love. How else are we supposed to know how important they are?

Sybil Wagner

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