I caught you a delicious bass.

Napoleon Dynamite

Jeff Megall: Sony has a futuristic sci-fi movie they're looking to make.
Nick Naylor: Cigarettes in space?
Jeff Megall: It's the final frontier, Nick.
Nick Naylor: But wouldn't they blow up in an all oxygen environment?
Jeff Megall: Probably. But it's an easy fix. One line of dialogue. 'Thank God we invented the... you know, whatever device.'

Michael Bolton: I don't know what happened, I must have missed a decimal point or something...
Peter Gibbons: Well, corporate accounts is sure as hell gonna notice $305,326.13 Michael!

Danny, I'm having a party this weekend. [pauses a beat] How would you like to come over and mow my lawn?

Judge Smails

We count our victories by the bombers we get to their targets, by the husbands we return to their wives, by the fathers we give back to their children. To the last minute, to the last man we fight. We fight!

Colonel A.J. Bullard

Neo: It's been an honor, sir.
Morpheus: No. The honor is still mine.

Stu Price: Oh my God, I can't believe I gave away my grandmother's Holocaust ring to a complete stranger.
Alan Garner: Yeah, I didn't even know they gave out rings during the Holocaust.

[to Holmes as he guzzles a liquid] You do know what your are drinking is meant for eye surgery?

Dr. John Watson

Mmm-hmm. Most of the time I have all these thoughts bouncin' around in my head... but with a brush in my hand, the world just gets kinda quiet.

Young Allie

Don't got the stones? You ignorant punk. I play for money. I owe rent. Child support. I play for money, not the fuckin' world series on ESPN.

Joey Knish

It's like a division sign.


[In an Irish accent] I'll believe ya when me shit turns purple and smells like rainbow sherbet.

Captain O'Hagan

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